#1 humor site on the 'net

Car Plunge

When quality goes down in an auto body shop

Car Plunge thanks to Mike King

Car trends go downwards for some mechanics

QuotaBills
Afford: Popular type of car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Never insult anyone by accident. - Robert A. Heinlein

Safety doesn't happen by accident. - Unknown

Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie. - David Mamet

Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident. - Mark Twain

Never invest emergency savings in the stock market. - Suze Orman

If stress burned calories, I'd be a supermodel. - Unknown

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Reality: The leading cause of stress among those in touch with it. - Lily Tomlin

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of mental illness. - Richard Carlson

Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. - Natalie Goldberg

A diamond is just a piece of coal that handles stress exceptionally well. - Unknown

I aimed at the public's heart and by accident I hit it in the stomach. - Upton Sinclair

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

Stress depletes willpower, which diminishes your ability to control those emotions. - Roy F Baumeister

The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another. - William James

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

Drive-in banks were established so most of the cars today could see their real owners. - E. Joseph Crossman

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

The plunge of civilization into this abyss of blood and darkness is too tragic for any words. - Henry James

I have to tell them that last night was a shameful train wreck filled with blind cuddly puppies. - Charlie Sheen

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

If I weren't skateboarding, I'd love to race cars. I like anything that's fast and active. - Ryan Sheckler

My husband is so good at home repairs that they have a special VIP area for him in the emergency room. - Unknown

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

It's a sad day when you find out that it's not accident or fortune but just yourself that kept things from you. - Lillian Hellman

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket, or a holding pattern over Philadelphia. - Judith Viorst

Animals are not our selfie props. If there's any risk that your photo is going to hurt or stress an animal, it's not worth it. - Angela Henderson

Keep your sense of humor. There's enough stress in the rest of your life to let bad shots ruin a game you're supposed to enjoy. - Amy Alcott

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman


Bach Flip

Apathy Mountain

Solemate

Double Vision

Please Help My Car

Adultery

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Moses' USB Tablets

Virus Update

Carnations vs. Roses

Waterproof Notepad

Sudoku Cats

Harlie's Angel

Ladder Load

Road To Nowhere

Bartender Mechanic

Promote Yourself

Noteable Bartender

Microsoft Innovation

Complaint Jar

First Selfie

Leave My Drink Alone

Great Scott!

Golden End of the Rainbow