Career Choices

I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King

Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw

Adventure is the champagne of life. - G K Chesterton

Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

A career is a job that has gone on too long. - Jeff MacNelly

My only career goal is to be a Halloween icon. - Nuno Roque

Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman

I now close my military career and just fade away. - Douglas MacArthur

The fountain of youth is a mixture of gin and vermouth. - Cole Porter

For Fang, getting out of bed in the morning is a career move. - Phyllis Diller

Banking may well be a career from which no man really recovers. - John Kenneth Galbraith

God invented whiskey to prevent the Irish from ruling the world. - Irish Saying

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits

You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill

She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon. - Groucho Marx

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. - Benjamin Franklin

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

Too much of anything is bad. Too much of good whisky is barely enough. - Mark Twain

A raise is like a martini: it elevates the spirit, but only temporarily. - Dan Seligman

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson

Every woman dreams of her own political career and her own place in life. - Raisa M. Gorbachev

Most of the early part of an actor's career, you do the jobs you get. - Jack Nicholson

A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world. - Louis Pasteur

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold. - Jerry Vale

Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany

Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'll bring ya a bottle of champagne. Maybe I'll even bring home a whole maggot. - Archie Bunker

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

I will never stop doing stand-up; that's my career, but I will do movies in Hollywood. - Russell Peters

I'm like old wine. They don't bring me out very often - but I'm well preserved. - Rose Kennedy

Everyone should experience defeat at least once during their career. You learn a lot from it. - Lou Holtz

Jameson's Irish Whiskey really does improve with age: the older I get the more I like it. - Bob Monkhouse

Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon. - Dag Hammarskjold

Assume any career move you make won't go smoothly. They won't. But don't look back. - Andy Grove

My career must be slipping. This is the first time I've been available to pick up an award. - Michael Caine

Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana

Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. - Carl Jung

A good manager is a man who isn't worried about his own career but the careers of those who work for him. - H.M.S. Burns

What if the kid you bullied at school, grew up, and turned out to be the only surgeon who could save your life? - Lynette Mather

We have embarked upon the world's largest and longest cocktail party, and every issue imaginable is up for grabs. - Geoffrey Moore

The only weapon with which the unconscious patient can immediately retaliate upon the incompetent surgeon is hemorrhage. - William Stewart Halsted

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

I have frequently been questioned, especially by women, of how I could reconcile family life with a scientific career. Well, it has not been easy. - Marie Curie

The simple act of opening a bottle of wine has brought more happiness to the human race than all the collective governments in the history of earth. - Jim Harrison