Cosmetic Car

I am an optimistic lady. - Julie Andrews

I like perfume and flowers. - Donatella Versace

Money is the best cosmetic. - International Proverb

Fame is the perfume of heroic deeds. - Socrates

Bad Driver: The person you run into. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The lady doth protest too much, methinks. - William Shakespeare

There is no cosmetic for beauty like happiness. - Lady Marguerite Blessington

A gentleman never strikes a lady with his hat on. - Fred Allen

To my embarrassment, I was born in bed with a lady. - Wilson Mizner

Perfume: Any smell that is used to drown a worse one. - Elbert Hubbard

This is a feminist bookstore. There is no humour section. - John Callahan

I think if I were a woman I'd wear coffee as a perfume. - John Van Druten

I became a feminist as an alternative to becoming a masochist. - Sally Kempton

A lady of a 'certain age', which means Certainly aged. - Lord Byron

Sometimes I consider myself as a feminist, whatever that means. - Sarah Palin

Destiny is a Paris driver pushing a taxicab with my name on it. - Frank Dane

In the factory we make cosmetics, but in my stores we sell hope. - Charles Revson

Taxi Driver: Worker who earns a living by driving customers away - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Don't say the old lady screamed. Bring her on and let her scream. - Mark Twain

There is not so variable a thing in nature as a lady's head-dress. - Joseph Addison

Adding sound to movies would be like putting lipstick on the Venus de Milo. - Mary Pickford

My mom told me a long time ago, 'Never get in a fight with a lady.' - Oliver North

Never break your putter and your driver in the same round or you're dead. - Tommy Bolt

The most beautiful makeup for a woman is passion. But cosmetics are easier to buy. - Yves St. Laurent

Like the cosmetics industry, the securities business is engaged in selling illusion. - Paul Samuelson

The one thing you shouldn't do is try to tell a cab driver how to get somewhere. - Jimmy Fallon

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you and scorn in the one ahead. - Mac McCleary

The one thing I do not want to be called is First Lady. It sounds like a saddle horse. - Jacqueline Kennedy

Ladies and gentlemen are permitted to have friends in the kennel but not in the kitchen. - George Bernard Shaw

The cure for a broken heart is simple, my lady. A hot bath and a good night's sleep. - Margaret George

Poker Hand: What you do when you’re trying to get a blood sample from the finger of a lady - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid. - Jane Austen

Ladies, if a man says he will fix it, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it. - Unknown

If all the young ladies who attended the Yale prom were laid end to end, no one would be the least surprised. - Dorothy Parker

When I was in boy scouts, I slipped on the ice and hurt my ankle. A little old lady had to help me across the street. - Steven Wright

A husband is a guy who tells you when you’ve got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick. - Ogden Nash

She ran after the garbage truck yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?"
The driver said, "No, jump in!" - Red Skelton

If you are really Master of your Fate,
It shouldn't make any difference to you whether Cleopatra or the Bearded Lady is your mate. - Ogden Nash

Wanderbra: Designed to assist ladies blessed with an ample, and once firm, bosom that now wanders off in all directions at every opportunity - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'm readin' in the paper where the CIA is dopin' people up. Maybe somebody injected some of that LSD in the lady's cottage cheese. - Archie Bunker