Eat Here

Bonjour, you cheese-eating surrender monkeys. - Groundskeeper Willie

Is that a beard, or are you eating a muskrat? - Dr Gonzo

When eating bamboo sprouts, remember the man who planted them. - China Proverb

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame. - Kohta Hirano

Eating an artichoke is like getting to know someone really well. - Willi Hastings

No man is lonely eating spaghetti; it requires so much attention. - Christopher Morley

Her face looked like something on the menu in a seafood restaurant. - Woody Allen

Venice is like eating an entire box of chocolate liqueurs in one go. - Truman Capote

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant? - George Carlin

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them? - George Carlin

If you get melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly. - Unknown

Success is having ten honeydew melons and eating only the top half of each slice. - Barbra Streisand

You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jellybeans. - Ronald Reagan

Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake.
Stepped on the gas instead of the brake. - Jonathan Blake

I hate television. I hate it as much as peanuts. But I can't stop eating peanuts. - Orson Welles

Of course I have played outdoor games. I once played dominoes in an open air cafe in Paris. - Oscar Wilde

Being kissed by a man who doesn't wax his moustache is like eating an egg without salt. - Rudyard Kipling

The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. - Joe E Lewis

I love eating sushi and eating raw and clean - no pasta and bread. Low carbs is what works for me. - Christine Teigen

It was really strange to see all these apes standing around eating popcorn, smoking, wearing sunglasses. - Estella Warren

If I don't work, I'll be sitting on the couch watching TV, eating popcorn and getting like a cow. - Celia Cruz

I'm not from a maple producing area and so my maple syrup credentials are very much of the eating side. - Nancy Greeme

The wonderful world of home appliances now makes it possible to cook indoors with charcoal and outdoors with gas. - Bill Vaughan

If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of the television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners. - Johnny Carson

I went to a fancy French restaurant called "Deja Vu." The headwaiter said, "Don't I know you?" - Steven Wright

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. - Steven Wright

The disparity between a restaurant's price and food quality rises in direct proportion to the size of the pepper mill. - Bryan Miller

One of the most wonderful things about life is that we must regularly stop what we are doing and devote our attention to eating. - Samuel Johnson

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

I'm always interested in finding the new trend. If you love pizza every day, after 22 years of eating pizza, you want to try sushi. - Jean Pigozzi

I'm pretty sure that eating chocolate keeps wrinkles away because I have never seen a 10 year old with a Hershey bar and crows feet. - Amy Neftzger

One of the very nicest things about life is the way we must regularly stop whatever it is we are doing and devote our attention to eating. - Luciano Pavarotti

Eating a tuna roll at a sushi restaurant should be considered no more environmentally benign than driving a Hummer or harpooning a manatee. - Daniel Pauly

Oil prices have fallen lately. We include this news for the benefit of gas stations, which otherwise wouldn't learn of it for six months. - Bill Tammeus

Money is like gasoline during a road trip. You don't want to run out of gas on your trip, but you're not doing a tour of gas stations. - Tim O'Reilly