Egg Tester

Childhood is a wilderness. - Aspen Matis

I am fond of children - except boys. - Lewis Carroll

One good egg in a barrel of rotten apples. - Archie Bunker

Familiarity breeds contempt - and children. - Mark Twain

You can't hatch chickens from fried eggs. - German Proverb

I preferred sewing to bossing little children. - Martha Jones

The best way to make children is to make them happy. - Oscar Wilde

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

Our greatest natural resource is the minds of our children. - Walt Disney

Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion. - Miguel de Unamuno

As long as you know men are like children, you know everything. - Coco Chanel

We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley

No one was ever great without some portion of divine inspiration. - Cicero

As a child, the only clear thought I had was "Get candy." - Jerry Seinfeld

Children see things very well sometimes - and idealists even better. - Lorraine Hansbury

Sometimes the poorest man leaves his children the richest inheritance. - Ruth E. Renkel

It was so windy that one of our chickens laid the same egg four times. - Unknown

My children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced on television. - Erma Bombeck

If you want your children to listen, try talking softly to someone else. - Ann Landers

Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard

All kids need is a little help, a little hope, and somebody who believes in them. - Earvin "Magic" Johnson

The most important question in the world is, "Why is the child crying?" - Alice Walker

My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night she used me to time an egg. - Rodney Dangerfield

You know children are growing up when they start asking questions that have answers. - John J Plomp

Hopefully, kids realize you can do anything you want. Skateboarding can be that gateway. - Ryan Sheckler

Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave
when they think that their children are naive. - Ogden Nash

Noise proves nothing. Often a hen who has merely laid an egg cackles as if she laid an asteroid. - Mark Twain

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them. - Phyllis Diller

Success is the good fortune that comes from aspiration, desperation, perspiration and inspiration. - Evan Esar

Fathers are like a lighthouse - when there is fog his children can always depend on seeing the light. - Unknown

A man who gives his children habits of industry provides for them better than by giving them a fortune. - Richard Whately

Parents should leave books lying around marked "forbidden" if they want their children to read. - Doris Lessing

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold. - Ogden Nash

Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don't know one child with a full time job and children. - Bill Hicks

Having children is like living in a frat house - nobody sleeps, everything's broken and there's a lot of throwing up. - Ray Romano

I like a well-roasted rotisserie chicken and eggs cooked various ways like sunny-side up or scrambled. It's comfort food for me. - Joel Robuchion

Play is the highest expression of human development in childhood for it alone is the free expression of what is in a child's soul. - Friedrich Frobel

If you want your children to be intelligent, read them fairy tales. If you want them to be more intelligent, read them more fairy tales. - Albert Einstein

If you never want to see a man again, just tell him, "I love you. I want to marry you. I want to have children." They leave skid marks. - Rita Rudner