Ferret Bottle

Save water - drink vodka. - Unknown

Out of water, I am nothing. - Duke Kahanamoku

Water is the only drink for a wise man. - Henry David Thoreau

Water that does not move is always shallow. - Sami Proverb

A tear is made of 1% water and 99% feelings. - Unknown

Thirst was made for water; inquiry for truth. - C S Lewis

The conscious water saw its Master and blushed. - Alexander Pope

Sometimes I drink water just to surprise my liver. - WC Fields

He was so good he would pour rose water on a toad. - Douglas Jerrold

Idleness, like kisses, to be sweet must be stolen. - Jerome A Jerome

You never miss the water till the well has run dry. - Irish Proverb

A mixture of brandy and water spoils two good things. - Charles Lamb

We never know the worth of water till the well is dry. - English Proverb

Be on your guard against a silent dog and still water. - Latin Proverb

Droughts are because god didn't pay his water bill. - Steven Wright

I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle. - Mitch Hedberg

Don't bargain for fish which are still in the water. - India Proverb

I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean. - G K Chesterton

If there is magic on this planet, it is contained in water. - Loren Eiseley

Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water! - Groucho Marx

Say anything that you like about me except that I drink water. - WC Fields

I ran a 100-mile marathon, and I was powered by coconut water. - Jesse Itzler

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him float. - Unknown

Washable: What a cowboy does, very carefully, with soap and water - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Water, air, and cleanliness are the chief articles in my pharmacy. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Love and work are to people, what water and sunshine are to plants. - Jonathan Haidt

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. - Dorothy Parker

You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it. - WC Fields

I bought some powdered water, but I don't know what to add to it. - Steven Wright

My wife's an earth sign. I'm a water sign. Together we make mud. - Henny Youngman

Gardening requires lots of water, most of it in the form of perspiration. - Lou Erickson

I never stole a joke in my life. I just find them before they're lost. - Milton Berle

I've been married so long I'm on my third bottle of Tabasco sauce. - Susan Vass

Men are not hanged for stealing horses, but that horses may not be stolen. - George Savile

The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl. - Dave Barry

When in doubt as to the applicability of a disinfectant, use soap and water. - Martin H. Fischer

You don't drown by falling into water. You only drown if you stay there. - Zig Ziglar

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

A woman is like a teabag. Only in hot water do you realize how strong she is. - Nancy Reagan

Don't be a fish; be a frog. Swim in the water and jump when you hit ground. - Kim Young-ha

If one glass of wine is good for you, just imagine what a whole bottle could do! - Unknown

Start writing, no matter what. The water does not flow until the faucet is turned on. - Louis L'Amour

I'll bring ya a bottle of champagne. Maybe I'll even bring home a whole maggot. - Archie Bunker

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water. - Eleanor Roosevelt

The miracle is not to fly in the air, or to walk on the water, but to walk on the earth. - Chinese Proverb

I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy. - WC Fields

Before enlightenment: chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment: chop wood, carry water. - Zen Buddhist Saying

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster

Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana

My grandfather is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle. - Henny Youngman

A wise man adapts himself to circumstances, as water shapes itself to the vessel that contains it. - Chinese Proverb

When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either use one more club or two more balls. - Unknown

Age is just a number. It's totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine. - Joan Collins

When the clergyman's daughter
Drinks nothing but water
She's certain to finish on gin. - Rudyard Kipling

Like the old adverb, "you can lead a gift horse to the water but ya can't look in his mouth." - Archie Bunker

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness. - Emo Philips

When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV! - Homer Simpson

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

Be ruthless about your calendar - stick to it, hell or high water but create space for unstructured time as well. - Arjun Arora

Be like a duck, paddling and working very hard inside the water, but what everyone sees is a smiling and calm face. - Manoj Arora

I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife. - Ilie Nastase

Some lawyers are like unto the camel, which, before drinking out of a brook, maketh the water turbid with his foot. - Adolphus W Ward

After all, when a stone is dropped into a pond, the water continues quivering even after the stone has sunk to the bottom. - Arthur Golden

Menopause is thicker than water. When we talk and laugh about it, we learn and relax. It's a life transition, not a disease. - Unknown

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

Iron rusts from disuse; stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind. - Leonardo da Vinci

Memory is a net: one finds it full of fish when he takes it from the brook, but a dozen miles of water have run through it without sticking. - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, 'keep away from children.' - Susan Savannah