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Ferret Bottle

For annoying cats that won't drink out of a bowl

Ferret Bottle thanks to Roy Taylor

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Save water - drink vodka. - Unknown

Out of water, I am nothing. - Duke Kahanamoku

Hot Chocolate: Stolen candy - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Water is the only drink for a wise man. - Henry David Thoreau

Friendship is a plant we must often water. - German Proverb

Water that does not move is always shallow. - Sami Proverb

Comedy is like catching lightning in a bottle. - Goldie Hawn

Bread and water can so easily be toast and tea. - Janet Clarkson

The conscious water saw its Master and blushed. - Alexander Pope

Water Polo: What horses play in the swimming pool - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Idleness, like kisses, to be sweet must be stolen. - Jerome A Jerome

You never miss the water till the well has run dry. - Irish Proverb

The genie can't be pushed back into the bottle. - David N Leff

A mixture of brandy and water spoils two good things. - Charles Lamb

Be on your guard against a silent dog and still water. - Latin Proverb

People run from rain but sit in bathtubs full of water. - Charles Bukowski

Plagiarists are always suspicious of being stolen from. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

The cure for anything is salt water - sweat, tears or the sea. - Isak Dinesen

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him float. - Unknown

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. - English Proverb

Washable: What a cowboy does, very carefully, with soap and water - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Water, air, and cleanliness are the chief articles in my pharmacy. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Don't think there are no crocodiles because the water is calm. - Malayan Proverb

You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it. - WC Fields

Boat: A hole in the water surrounded by wood into which one pours money - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. - WC Fields

An entire ocean can't sink a ship unless it allows the water inside. - Donna Smith

Gardening requires lots of water, most of it in the form of perspiration. - Lou Erickson

I've been married so long I'm on my third bottle of Tabasco sauce. - Susan Vass

The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl. - Dave Barry

I finally found out how priests get holy water. They boil the hell out of it. - Joan Rivers

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments. - Chris Rock

Lake: Large body of water into which a kid will jump should his friends do so - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Don't be a fish; be a frog. Swim in the water and jump when you hit ground. - Kim Young-ha

Warm Water Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

British Museum: The most magnificent collection of stolen antiquities in the world - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You can lead a herring to water, but you have to walk really fast or he'll die. - Rose

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

Tavern: 1. Thirst come, thirst served; 2. A place where madness is sold by the bottle. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The dignity of movement of an iceberg is due to only one ninth of it being above water. - Ernest Hemingway

We should be as water, which is lower than all things yet stronger even than the rocks. - Sioux Proverb

The miracle is not to fly in the air, or to walk on the water, but to walk on the earth. - Chinese Proverb

I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy. - WC Fields

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water. - Unknown

If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster

The toilets at a local police station have been stolen. Police say they have nothing to go on. - Ronnie Corbett

Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana

What is harder than rock, or softer than water? Yet soft water hollows out hard rock. Persevere. - Ovid

Most whale photos you see show whales in this beautiful blue water - it's almost like space. - Brian Skerry

A wise man adapts himself to circumstances, as water shapes itself to the vessel that contains it. - Chinese Proverb

When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either use one more club or two more balls. - Unknown

When the clergyman's daughter
Drinks nothing but water
She's certain to finish on gin. - Rudyard Kipling

Whatever I am offered in devotion with a pure heart - a leaf, a flower, fruit, or water - I accept with joy. - Bhagavad Gita

Going without food or water will kill the body, but the lack of relationship will kill the minds and spirit. - David Jeremiah

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness. - Emo Philips

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

Sailor: 1. A man who makes his living on water but never touches it on shore; 2. A wolf in ship's clothing. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Milk is the drink of babies, tea the drink of women, water the drink of beasts, and wine is the drink of the gods. - John S Blackie

Some lawyers are like unto the camel, which, before drinking out of a brook, maketh the water turbid with his foot. - Adolphus W Ward

How come if you mix flour and water together you get glue? And when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go? - Rita Rudner

Menopause is thicker than water. When we talk and laugh about it, we learn and relax. It's a life transition, not a disease. - Unknown

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

From a drop of water a logician could infer the possibility of an Atlantic or a Niagara without having seen or heard of one or the other. - Arthur Conan Doyle

Iron rusts from disuse; stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind. - Leonardo da Vinci

Memory is a net: one finds it full of fish when he takes it from the brook, but a dozen miles of water have run through it without sticking. - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

A leader is not an administrator who loves to run others, but someone who carries water for his people, so that they can get on with their jobs. - Robert Townsend

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: "President Can't Swim." - Lyndon B. Johnson

If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, 'keep away from children.' - Susan Savannah


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