Ferret Bottle

Water rusts pipes. - WC Fields

Save water - drink vodka. - Unknown

RIP boiling water - you will be mist. - Unknown

Water is the only drink for a wise man. - Henry David Thoreau

Hard Water: The scientific name for ice - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Kettle Drum: What musicians boil water in - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Friendship is a plant we must often water. - German Proverb

Sacrilege: Shelf for bottles of holy water - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The water doesn't know how old you are. - Dara Torres

Thirst was made for water; inquiry for truth. - C S Lewis

The conscious water saw its Master and blushed. - Alexander Pope

Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody. - Mark Twain

He was so good he would pour rose water on a toad. - Douglas Jerrold

Idleness, like kisses, to be sweet must be stolen. - Jerome A Jerome

The genie can't be pushed back into the bottle. - David N Leff

A mixture of brandy and water spoils two good things. - Charles Lamb

Plagiarists are always suspicious of being stolen from. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean. - G K Chesterton

You can't cross the sea merely by staring at the water. - Rabindranath Tagore

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. - Mitch Hedberg

Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water! - Groucho Marx

I moved to Florida because you don't have to shovel water. - James Randi

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him float. - Unknown

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. - English Proverb

Washable: What a cowboy does, very carefully, with soap and water - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Water, air, and cleanliness are the chief articles in my pharmacy. - Napoleon Bonaparte

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. - Dorothy Parker

You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it. - WC Fields

Somewhere, behind space and time,
Is wetter water, slimier slime. - Rupert Brooke

My wife's an earth sign. I'm a water sign. Together we make mud. - Henny Youngman

An entire ocean can't sink a ship unless it allows the water inside. - Donna Smith

Men are not hanged for stealing horses, but that horses may not be stolen. - George Savile

You don't drown by falling into water. You only drown if you stay there. - Zig Ziglar

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

If one glass of wine is good for you, just imagine what a whole bottle could do! - Unknown

Don't throw away the old bucket until you know whether the new one holds water. - Swedish Proverb

I took a physical for some life insurance. All they would give me was fire and theft. - Milton Berle

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

I'll bring ya a bottle of champagne. Maybe I'll even bring home a whole maggot. - Archie Bunker

When ya go out there in the water and ya start crossing your longirudes and lassitudes. - Archie Bunker

The miracle is not to fly in the air, or to walk on the water, but to walk on the earth. - Chinese Proverb

I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy. - WC Fields

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water. - Unknown

If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster

Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana

What is harder than rock, or softer than water? Yet soft water hollows out hard rock. Persevere. - Ovid

God is not a genie in a bottle, and your wish is not His command. His command better be your wish. - Mark Batterson

Age is just a number. It's totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine. - Joan Collins

Like the old adverb, "you can lead a gift horse to the water but ya can't look in his mouth." - Archie Bunker

Whatever I am offered in devotion with a pure heart - a leaf, a flower, fruit, or water - I accept with joy. - Bhagavad Gita

When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV! - Homer Simpson

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

The true identity theft is not financial. It's not in cyberspace. It's spiritual. It's been taken. - Stephen Covey

I'll never forget my first fur. It was a modest little stole. Modest? People thought I was wearing anchovies. - Phyllis Diller

Gold and diamonds are nice, but clean, crisp, controlled water has long been the preeminent hallmark of the rich. - Anthony Doerr

Milk is the drink of babies, tea the drink of women, water the drink of beasts, and wine is the drink of the gods. - John S Blackie

Be like a duck, paddling and working very hard inside the water, but what everyone sees is a smiling and calm face. - Manoj Arora

I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife. - Ilie Nastase

After all, when a stone is dropped into a pond, the water continues quivering even after the stone has sunk to the bottom. - Arthur Golden

Ordinary riches can be stolen; real riches cannot. In your soul are infinitely precious things that cannot be taken from you. - Oscar Wilde

The Duchess smashed the bottle against the bow and amid the applause of the crowd she slid on her greasy bottom into the sea. - Unknown

Love would never be a promise of a rose garden unless it is showered with light of faith, water of sincerity and air of passion. - Unknown

Menopause is thicker than water. When we talk and laugh about it, we learn and relax. It's a life transition, not a disease. - Unknown

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

From a drop of water a logician could infer the possibility of an Atlantic or a Niagara without having seen or heard of one or the other. - Arthur Conan Doyle

Memory is a net: one finds it full of fish when he takes it from the brook, but a dozen miles of water have run through it without sticking. - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

The simple act of opening a bottle of wine has brought more happiness to the human race than all the collective governments in the history of earth. - Jim Harrison

One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler

If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, 'keep away from children.' - Susan Savannah