Flatulent Cow

In the dark, all cows are black. - German Proverb

Organic Farm: Tilling like it is - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Never kick a cow chip on a hot day. - Will Rogers

We are here on Earth to fart around. - Kurt Vonnegut

Vice-President: A cow's fifth teat. - Harry S Truman

Milk the cow but do not pull off the udder. - Greek Proverb

I left as welcome as a fart in a spacesuit. - Billy Connolly

We can dance on pinheads till the cows come home. - Alastair Campbell

De-caffeinated: What a cow gets when it has a baby - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain

A good farm is recognized as good partly by its beauty. - Wendell Berry

Farm: What a city man dreams of at 5 P.M., never at 5 A.M. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Change is like a charging cow. Don't ignore it - milk it. - Andrew Leigh

Heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns. - Groucho Marx

Stable: A command given to make a male cow remain in one place - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Mrs. O'Leary's cow is sorry, but Cleveland burned anyway. - Archie Bunker

The cow is of the bovine ilk;
One end is moo, the other milk. - Ogden Nash

All the good ideas I ever had came to me while I was milking a cow. - Grant Wood

Traveling through hyperspace ain't like dusting crops, farm boy. - Han Solo

You should never hesitate to trade your cow for a handful of magic beans. - Tom Robbins

From every Englishman emanates a kind of gas, the deadly choke-lamp of boredom. - Heinrich Heine

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them? - George Carlin

Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake.
Stepped on the gas instead of the brake. - Jonathan Blake

Abundance: 1. Big party held in a bakery; 2. A social event held in a farm building. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Mankind has a free will; but it is free to milk cows and to build houses, nothing more. - Martin Luther

I never said all actors are cattle; what I said was all actors should be treated like cattle. - Alfred Hitchcock

I was in a sushi bar and it dawned on me - how could I discriminate between a cow and a fish? - Carre Otis

If I don't work, I'll be sitting on the couch watching TV, eating popcorn and getting like a cow. - Celia Cruz

I'm a farm boy. If we need five people to haul in hay, we don't take one and just work them to death. - Lincoln Davis

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

Hunters will tell you that a moose is a wily and ferocious forest creature. Nonsense. A moose is a cow drawn by a three-year-old. - Bill Bryson

You're supposed to eat the cows. They're great big lumbering, stupid things - they'd be everywhere if we didn't eat them. - Dylan Moran

Oil prices have fallen lately. We include this news for the benefit of gas stations, which otherwise wouldn't learn of it for six months. - Bill Tammeus

Money is like gasoline during a road trip. You don't want to run out of gas on your trip, but you're not doing a tour of gas stations. - Tim O'Reilly

When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent. - George Carlin

Ear: 1. A place where kids store dirt; 2. (Southern) A colorless, odorless gas (unless you are in LA). Usage: 'He can't breathe... give 'em some ear!' - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Man is that being who invented the gas chambers of Auschwitz; however, he is also that being who entered those chambers upright, with the Lord's Prayer or the Shema Yisrael on his lips. - Viktor Frankl

It's every man's indispensable duty to do all the service he can to his country; and I see not what difference he puts between himself and his cattle who lives without that thought. - John Locke

Should any political party attempt to abolish social security, unemployment insurance, and eliminate labor laws and farm programs, you would not hear of that party again in our political history. - Dwight D Eisenhower