#1 humor site on the 'net

German Forest

Living sculpture frames German landscape

German Forest thanks to Lucien Renaud

Tree sculpture art in Germany

QuotaBills
German headshrinker named Sigmund Fruit - Archie Bunker

Time spent amongst trees is never wasted time. - Katrina Mayer

The righteous will flourish like the palm tree. - Psalms 92:12

Trees cause more pollution than automobiles do. - Ronald Reagan

Once there was a tree, and she loved a little boy. - Shel Silverstein

The best cure for sea sickness, is to sit under a tree. - Spike Milligan

I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap. - Rodney Dangerfield

The patriot's blood is the seed of Freedom's tree. - Thomas Campbell

I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree. - Joyce Kilmer

If you don't like where you are, move. You are not a tree. - Unknown

When you think about a walking tree, laughter is the response. - John Rhys-Davies

I took a walk in the woods and came out taller than the trees. - Henry David Thoreau

If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears, does it make a sound? - Unknown

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now. - Chinese Proverb

Learn not to talk to me. You shake the tree, a leopard's going to fall out. - Kobe Bryant

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap. - Fred Allen

A cold wind was blowing from the north, and it made the trees rustle like living things. - George R.R. Martin

Someone's sitting in the shade today because someone planted a tree a long time ago. - Warren Buffett

Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them. - Bill Vaughan

Transplanting the ballet to the United States is like trying to raise a palm tree in Dakota. - Lincoln Kirsten

Shady Character: A fellow who snoozes in a hammock under a tree while his wife mows the lawn - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree. - Martin Luther

The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. - Thomas Jefferson

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

It's better to fall from a tree and break your back than to fall in love and break your heart. - African Proverb

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire? - Unknown

Whatever music sounds like, I am glad to say that it does not sound in the smallest degree like German. - Oscar Wilde

Wood: That remarkable material which burns so easily in a forest and with such difficulty in a fireplace - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

He that climbs the tall tree has won the right to the fruit; he that leaps the wide gulf should prevail in his suit. - Walter Scott

Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. - Abraham Lincoln

When anyone asks me about the Irish character, I say look at the trees. Maimed, stark and misshapen, but ferociously tenacious. - Unknown

As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on. - Woody Allen

Hunters will tell you that a moose is a wily and ferocious forest creature. Nonsense. A moose is a cow drawn by a three-year-old. - Bill Bryson

I glanced out the window at the signs of spring. The sky was almost blue, the trees were almost budding, the sun was almost bright. - Millard Kaufman

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

I felt my lungs inflate with the onrush of scenery - air, mountains, trees, people. I thought, 'This is what it is to be happy.' - Sylvia Plath

The axe cannot boast of the tree it has cut down. It could do nothing but for the woodsman. He made it, he sharpened it, and he used it. - Samuel Brengel

Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong. - George Carlin

I think that I shall never see
A billboard lovely as a tree;
Perhaps, unless the billboards fall,
I'll never see a tree at all. - Ogden Nash

Love is like the wild-rose briar, friendship like the holly-tree. The holly is dark when the rose-briar blooms, but which will bloom most constantly? - Emily Bronte


Bird's Eye View

Sea Girl

Lifeguard Distancing

Merry Go Motorbike

Build Back Better - Season 2

Build Back Better - Season 1

Zamboni Date

Bagpipe Runners

9 Months On The Inside

Noah Called

The Mighty Stegosaurus

Get A Dog They Said

Are You Ready?

Down Day

Peddle Sewing Machine Sink

You Never Call

Dawntastic

Work Rules

Navy Golf Course for Aircraft Carriers

Less Severe Inflation

Hotel Annex

King Stump

Diet Carbs

Home Made Limo