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Get Pharked

Introducing the Pharkberry from Australia's Dooralong Valley

Get Pharked thanks to Skippy Flink

The Australian wine industry is the world's fourth largest exporter of wine, for those who give a Phark

QuotaBills
Good wine needs no vine. - French Proverb

I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King

I like a wine that fights back. - John Steed

Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw

Good wine is a necessity of life. - Thomas Jefferson

Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder. - Addison Mizner

Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown

Compromises are for relationships, not wine. - Robert S Caywood

Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin

What whiskey will not cure, there is no cure for. - Irish Proverb

The fountain of youth is a mixture of gin and vermouth. - Cole Porter

If God forbade drinking, would He have made wine so good? - Cardinal Richelieu

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin

It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

Stop trying to make everybody happy - you're not tequila. - Unknown

Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown

One martini is all right, two is too many, three is not enough. - James Thurber

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. - Benjamin Franklin

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

Too much of anything is bad. Too much of good whisky is barely enough. - Mark Twain

Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - Pope John XXIII

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron. - Phyllis Diller

I'm like old wine. They don't bring me out very often - but I'm well preserved. - Rose Kennedy

When a man who is drinking neat gin starts talking about his mother he is past all argument. - C.S. Forester

Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake. - WC Fields

Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz

Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. - Carl Jung

When the clergyman's daughter
Drinks nothing but water
She's certain to finish on gin. - Rudyard Kipling

I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. - Hunter S Thompson

There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid

The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

In those days the best painkiller was ice. It wasn't addictive, and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it. - George Burns


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