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Anatomy is destiny. - Sigmund Freud

Grief is itself a medicine. - William Cowper

Clinic: House of pill repute. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Nature is cheaper than therapy. - M P Zarrella

A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb

Astrology is a disease, not a science. - Maimonides

Borscht: Beet soup with high blood pressure - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We can close the books on infectious diseases. - William H Stewart

Panic plays no part in the training of a nurse. - Elizabeth Kenny

Psychoanalysis is the disease it claims to cure. - Karl Kraus

My doctor tells me I got a communications disease. - Archie Bunker

Surgeon: The person who was a cut-up at medical school - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

A nurse will always give us hope, an angel with a stethoscope. - Terri Guillemets

Document: Repeating what your Doctor told you in your own words - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Medicine is only for those who cannot imagine doing anything else. - Luanda Grazette

Save one life, you're a hero. Save 100 lives, you're a nurse. - Unknown

I was under medication when I made the decision not to burn the tapes. - Richard M Nixon

You couldn't tell if she was dressed for an opera or an operation. - Irvin S Cobb

Chocolate is cheaper than therapy, and you don't need an appointment. - Unknown

Financial ruin from medical bills is almost exclusively an American disease. - Roul Turley

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin

The practice of medicine is a thinker's job, the practice of surgery a plumber's. - Martin H. Fischer

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

Physiology is the stepchild of medicine. That is why Cinderella often turns out the queen. - Martin H. Fischer

My doctor gave me six months to live, but when I couldn't pay the bill he gave me six months more. - Walter Matthau

The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned. - George Balanchine

The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick

The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler

'Psychotherapy' is a private, confidential conversation that has nothing to do with illness, medicine, or healing. - Thomas Szasz

Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer

Love one another and help others to rise to the higher levels, simply by pouring out love. Love is infectious and the greatest healing energy. - Sai Baba

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer