Irish Flu Shots

No man is an Ireland. - Richard Daley

Good wine needs no vine. - French Proverb

Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

I'm Irish. We think sideways. - Spike Milligan

When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb

We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown

I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown

Compromises are for relationships, not wine. - Robert S Caywood

When Irish eyes are smiling, watch your step. - Gerald Kersh

Wine is the flower in the buttonhole of life. - Werumeus Buning

Wine is the most civilized thing in the world. - Ernest Hemingway

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin

There are not many Irish people playing tennis. - Goran Ivanisevic

The Danes and the Irish have a great simpatico. - Pierce Brosnan

When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

I'm Irish. I think about death all the time. - Jack Nicholson

Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman

What whiskey will not cure, there is no cure for. - Irish Proverb

As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The Irish are a very popular race - with themselves. - Brendan Behan

I have a thing for red-haired Irish boys, as we know. - Sandra Bullock

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

I'm just one stomach flu away from my goal weight. - The Devil Wears Prada

Liquor talks mighty loud when it gets loose from the jug. - Joel C Harris

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley

Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

I miss Irish milk. Probably not as much as Superquinn sausages. - Tristan MacManus

A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I

God invented whiskey to prevent the Irish from ruling the world. - Irish Saying

The Irish are a fair people, they never speak well of one another. - Samuel Johnson

In Ireland, a writer is looked upon as a failed conversationalist. - Unknown

We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano

It is a symbol of Irish art. The cracked looking-glass of a servant. - James Joyce

Irish Americans are no more Irish than Black Americans are Africans. - Bob Geldof

Irish people are educated not only about artistry but local history. - Fiona Shaw

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

Even when they have nothing, the Irish emit a kind of happiness, a joy. - Fiona Shaw

I had an Irish Catholic education. Horrible nuns, vindictive and cruel. - John Lydon

Irony: 1. Being witty at all costs; 2. A vegetarian catching swine flu. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

The English should give Ireland home rule - and reserve the motion picture rights. - Will Rogers

Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany

Equine Influenza: A viral respiratory disease which causes flu-like symptoms in horses - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'll bring ya a bottle of champagne. Maybe I'll even bring home a whole maggot. - Archie Bunker

New York champagne - that's a phony label. They don't grow raisins in New York. - Archie Bunker

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

Why is it that everybody's suing the tobacco companies and not the alcohol companies? - Donald Trump

The trouble with Ireland is that it's a country full of genius, with absolutely no talent. - Hugh Leonard

I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz

I grew up in an Irish Catholic family, and I think they force you to watch every James Cagney movie. - Jimmy Fallon

Being Irish, he had an abiding sense of tragedy, which sustained him through temporary periods of joy. - William Butler Yeats

I'm Irish on St. Patrick's Day. I'm Italian on Columbus Day. I'm a New Yorker every day. - Tamara Tunie

I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. - Hunter S Thompson

There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

As I told Piers Morgan, 'Catholics have confession, whereas Northern Irish Protestants only have interviews.' - James Nesbitt

May you always walk in sunshine. May you never want for more. May Irish angels rest their wings right beside your door. - Irish Blessings

We've never been cool, we're hot. Irish people are Italians who can't dress, Jamaicans who can't dance. - Bono

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

For my last meal, I'd want an Irish breakfast with soda bread and one of my dad's omelettes with three or four eggs. - Erin O'Connor

It's not that the Irish are cynical. It's rather that they have a wonderful lack of respect for everything and everybody. - Brendan Behan

That's what the holidays are for - for one person to tell the stories and another to dispute them. Isn't that the Irish way? - Lara Flynn Boyle

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor

Our ancestors believed in magic, prayers, trickery, browbeating and bullying. I think it would be fair to sum that up as 'Irish politics'. - Flann O'Brien

If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster

Franklin D. Roosevelt: "Why do you Irish always answer a question with a question?",
New York Mayor Al Smith: "Do we now?" - Franklin D Roosevelt