Jim Class

Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

I'm in no shape to exercise. - Unknown

Does running late count as exercise? - Unknown

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

I'm so unfamiliar with the gym I call it James. - Chi McBride

I am pushing sixty. That is enough exercise for me. - Mark Twain

Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body. - Joseph Addison

I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting. - Mark Twain

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

I often take exercise. Only yesterday I had breakfast in bed. - Oscar Wilde

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

Maybe I oughta get one of them priests in to exercise with her. - Archie Bunker

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away. - Paul Terry

Every time I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes. - Robert Hutchins

After exercising I always eat pizza... just kidding. I don't exercise. - Unknown

The world can't end today, because it's already tomorrow in Australia. - Charles M. Schulz

Google+ is the gym of social networking: we all join, but nobody actually uses it. - Unknown

When New Zealanders emigrate to Australia, it raises the average IQ of both countries. - Robert Muldoon

I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing. - Marsha Doble

I exercise extreme self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast. - WC Fields

I think it's an absolute disaster that Australia, the government, allowed kangaroo culling. - Steve Irwin

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia. - Charles M. Schulz

Old minds are like old horses; you must exercise them if you wish to keep them in working order. - John Adams

The test and the use of man's education is that he finds pleasure in the exercise of his mind. - Jacques Martin Barzun

Every leap year I like to jump. It’s a good way to get my daily exercise in every four years. - Jarod Kintz

Back in my rummy days, I would tremble and shake for hours upon arising. It was the only exercise I got. - WC Fields

Television remote controls encourage couch potatoes to exercise their options while broadening their base. - William Arthur Ward

When governments become large, voters cannot exercise close oversight, otherwise known as political power. - Maggie Gallagher

I don't know what that gas is made of, but it can't smell any worse than Ernie Johnson 's gym bag. - Charles Barkley

Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the muscles that can. - Terry Pratchett

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster