Kickback
How to score your own goal at the FIFA World Cup
Interactive football coverage
QuotaBillsThere's no place in racism for football. - Gareth Thomas
Soccer: A European warm-up exercise for rioting - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Academy: A modern school where football is taught - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Wrestlers are a bunch of wanna-be football players. - Brian Bosworth
I wake up laughing every day. I get a kick out of life. - Bruce Willis
Fan Belt: What a soccer fan uses to keep his trousers up - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Baseball is what we were, football is what we have become. - Mary McGrory
I played a little basketball. Some football in junior high. - Clint Eastwood
There's no educational value in the second kick of a mule. - American saying
All successful revolutions are the kicking in of a rotten door. - John Kenneth Galbraith
Football is a game designed to keep coal miners off the streets. - Jimmy Breslin
It is better to have died a small boy than to fumble this football. - John Heisman
Football Season: The time of the year when girls whistle at men in sweaters - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. - Emo Philips
Any jackass can kick down a barn, but it takes a good carpenter to build one. - Sam Rayburn
Gamekeeper: A soccer goalie who doesn't get upset, despite losing heavily - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Jerry Ford is a nice guy, but he played too much football with his helmet off. - Lyndon Baines Johnson
Football Game: A sport where a spectator takes four quarters to finish a fifth - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
It was a blonde. A blonde to make a bishop kick a hole in a stained glass window. - Raymond Chandler
If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. - Erma Bombeck
So like any football or basketball coach, you always believe you're going to win. - Colin Powell
College Professor: A man who gets what's left over after the football coach is paid off - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Beauty, to me, is about being comfortable in your own skin. That, or a kick-ass red lipstick. - Gwyneth Paltrow
I asked my hairdresser what would look good on me. She says a Los Angeles Rams football helmet. - Phyllis Diller
You know how kids dream of being soccer players or actors? Well, my dream was to be a sushi chef. - Nobu Matsuhisa
Football: A sport that bears the same relation to education that bullfighting does to agriculture - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Don't let negative and toxic people rent space in your head. Raise the rent and kick them out. - Zig Ziglar
I started out as a football player. I liked to inflict pain. In basketball, it was the same thing. - Shaquille O'Neal
I don't understand American football at all. It looks like all-in wrestling with crash helmets. - Sting
Eternity: 1. The last two minutes of a football game; 2. The time between you coming and her going. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Football combines the two worst things about America: it is violence punctuated by committee meetings. - George Will
The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. - Phyllis Diller
You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you. - Walt Disney
May I never be drunk enough to try to play a foosball table alone like that dude over there who actually is. - Dr. Okay Times
As a kid, you looked forward to Charlie Brown during Halloween and you looked forward to Monday Night Football. - Nick Ferguson
If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month. - Theodore Roosevelt
Shoulder Pads: The part of a football player's uniform designed to make him look as fearsome as a female executive - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Kicking is very important in football. In fact, some of the more enthusiastic players even kick the ball, occasionally. - Alfred Hitchcock
Baseball players are smarter than football players. How often do you see a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field? - Jim Bouton
My whole body is a wreck. I've injured myself so many times with jujitsu, skateboarding, football. I guess I like to live hard. - Scott Caan