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Message From The Wife

Eat more fruit - key ingredient for a healthy marital relationship

My friend got home late last night after a full day of golfing and drinking with the boys, and his wife left a message in the kitchen for him. I guess she wants him to eat more fruit...
Message From The Wife thanks to Barry McCartney

Secrets to a successful long-term relationship or marriage

QuotaBills
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx

Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love. - Joe E Lewis

Second Marriage: The triumph of hope over experience. - Samuel Johnson

Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has not pleasure. - Samuel Johnson

There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy. - Francois de La Rochefoucauld

Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her. - Ambrose Bierce

Don't marry a tennis player - love means nothing to them. - Joan Rivers

Marriage: A word which should be pronounced "mirage." - Herbert Spencer

I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years. - Sam Kinison

The key to success? Work hard, stay focused and marry a Kennedy. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

The more you invest in a marriage, the more valuable it becomes. - Amy Grant

Keep thy eyes wide open before marriage, and half shut afterward. - Thomas Fuller

All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner. - Red Skelton

He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of. - Mae West

A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short. - Andre Maurois

A man is often too young to marry, but a man is never too old to love. - Finnish Proverb

There's one thing about a late marriage - it doesn't last long. - Unknown

Watermelon - it's a good fruit. You eat, you drink, you wash your face. - Enrico Caruso

In marriage, being the right person is as important as finding the right person. - Wilbert Donald Gough

I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. - Gloria Steinem

The world has grown suspicious of anything that looks like a happily married life. - Oscar Wilde

A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time. - Anne Taylor Fleming

Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby

Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker

Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel. - Leonardo da Vinci

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

A good marriage was one in which each person thought he or she was getting the better deal. - Anne Lamott

I married your mother because I wanted children.
Imagine my disappointment when you came along. - Groucho Marx

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard for the night, she can still survive. - WC Fields

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned now to cook. - Andy Rooney

If the marriage needs help, the answer almost always is have more fun. Drop your list of grievances and go ride a roller coaster. - Garrison Keillor

A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance and tenacity. The order varies for any given year. - Paul Sweeney

Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who make you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat. - Joanne Woodward

One advantage of marriage is that when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again. - Judith Viorst

Fraud in business is no different from infidelity in marriage or plagiarism in scholarly work. Even people committed to high moral standards succumb. - Miroslav Volf


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