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Message From The Wife

Eat more fruit - key ingredient for a healthy marital relationship

My friend got home late last night after a full day of golfing and drinking with the boys, and his wife left a message in the kitchen for him. I guess she wants him to eat more fruit...
Message From The Wife thanks to Barry McCartney

Secrets to a successful long-term relationship or marriage

QuotaBills
Marriage is heaven and hell. - German Proverb

Hare Brush: Used to groom a rabbit - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - James Thurber

To marry the Irish is to look for poverty. - J.P. Donleavy

Love - a temporary insanity curable by marriage. - Ambrose Bierce

I don't trust any diet that doesn't allow sugar. - Bethenny Frankel

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. - Groucho Marx

The roots of education are bitter, but the fruit is sweet. - Aristotle

Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit. - Khalil Gibran

Marriage: A word which should be pronounced "mirage." - Herbert Spencer

Plant the seed of meditation and reap the fruit of peace of mind. - Unknown

All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner. - Red Skelton

Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp

A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes. - Joseph Addison

A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short. - Andre Maurois

Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad. - Woody Allen

I'm an emotional eater. When I get upset, my diet goes out the window. - Kelly Osbourne

I am on a ketos diet so I avoid sugar, dairy products, wheat, grain or pulses. - Puneet Issar

I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career. - Gloria Steinem

The world has grown suspicious of anything that looks like a happily married life. - Oscar Wilde

Well, at least he has found his true love - what a pity he can't marry himself. - Frank Sinatra

A long marriage is two people trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time. - Anne Taylor Fleming

Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert

Marriage is wonderful institution... if, of course, you like living in an institution. - Groucho Marx

How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive. - Oscar Wilde

I'm a very committed wife. I should be committed, too, for being married so many times. - Elizabeth Taylor

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him. - Cher

Whether you wind up with a nest egg or a goose egg depends on the kind of chick you married. - Unknown

First of all you’ve got to have talent. And then you've got to marry her like I did. - George Burns

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it. - Jackie Gleason

I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married. - Lewis Grizzard

Without the will, marriage is a mockery; without the emotion, it is a drudgery. You need both. - Ravi Zacharias

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

It is not your love that sustains the marriage, but from now on, the marriage that sustains your love. - Dietrich Bonhoeffer

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

He that climbs the tall tree has won the right to the fruit; he that leaps the wide gulf should prevail in his suit. - Walter Scott

I value my garden more for being full of blackbirds than of cherries, and very frankly give them fruit for their songs. - Joseph Addison

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming: 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it; 2. Whenever you're right, shut up. - Patrick Murra

If the marriage needs help, the answer almost always is have more fun. Drop your list of grievances and go ride a roller coaster. - Garrison Keillor

New Pasta Diet: Just walk pasta bakery without stopping. Walk pasta candy store without stopping. Walk pasta ice cream shop without stopping. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


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