Mom's Kid

Mother Superiority - Archie Bunker

Grammer: Your father's mother. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Leisure is the Mother of Philosophy. - Thomas Hobbes

Diligence is the mother of good fortune. - Benjamin Disraeli

Fearlessness is the mother of reinvention. - Arianna Huffington

I'm not crazy. My mother had me tested. - Unknown

Sons are the anchors of a mother's life. - Sophocles

An ounce of mother is worth a pound of clergy. - Spanish Proverb

Mother-In-Law Sandwich: Cold shoulder and tongue - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The best part of him ran down his mother's legs. - Jackie Gleason

My mom had a very difficult childhood. My childhood. - Cindy Marzahn

Mother's Life: One darned stocking after the other - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

For when a child is born the mother also is born again. - Gilbert Parker

A mother is one to whom you hurry when you are troubled. - Emily Dickinson

The titular head... that's the mother, ain't it? - Archie Bunker

All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel mother. - Abraham Lincoln

I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father. - Greg Norman

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

She's descended from a long line her mother listened to. - Gypsy Rose Lee

Mother is the home we come from. She is nature, soil, ocean. - Erich Fromm

Blaming mother is just a negative way of clinging to her still. - Nancy Friday

A mother is a story with no beginning. That is what defines her. - Meghan O'Rourke

Sweater: A garment worn by a child when his mother feels chilly. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Her mother was a cultivated woman - she was born in a greenhouse. - Spike Milligan

My mother was my role model before I even knew what that word was. - Lisa Leslie

To the world you are a mother, but to your family you are the world. - Unknown

The story of a mother's life: trapped between a scream and a hug. - Cathy Guisewite

Now, as always, the most automated appliance in a household is the mother. - Beverly Jones

My mother loved children - she would have given anything if I had been one. - Groucho Marx

The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother. - WC Fields

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

Couch Potato: What Mom finds under the sofa cushions after the kids eat dinner - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Antifreeze: What happens to your mother's sister when you steal her blanket - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - Henry Ward Beecher

Acceptance, tolerance, bravery, compassion. These are the things my mom taught me. - Lady Gaga

If you can't be in awe of Mother Nature, there's something wrong with you. - Alex Trebek

My nickname is 'Mom', but my full name is 'Mom Mom Mom Mom Mom Mom.' - Unknown

A grandmother is a little bit parent, a little bit teacher, and a little bit best friend. - Unknown

You don't have to deserve your mother's love. You have to deserve your father's. - Robert Frost

No matter how old a mother is, she watches her middle-aged children for signs of improvement. - Florida Scott-Maxwell

My mother had this amazing attitude in the face of everything, including when she got cancer. - Bill Clinton

If you have a mom, there is nowhere you are likely to go where a prayer has not already been. - Robert Brault

The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness. - Honore De Balzac

A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity. - Agatha Christie

Said the daughter: "I don't have to help my Mom with the housework. She knows how." - Unknown

Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day. - Jay Leno

My mother gave me my drive, but my father gave me my dreams. Thanks to him, I could see a future. - Liza Minnelli

I was such an ugly baby. My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend. - Rodney Dangerfield

Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong, even though they say it's okay in the Bible. - Homer Simpson

Food: The response Mom usually gives in answer to the question, "What's for dinner tonight?" - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My mother always told me I wouldn't amount to anything because I procrastinate. I said, Just wait. - Judy Tenuta

If I have done anything in life worth attention, I feel sure that I inherited the disposition from my mother. - Booker T. Washington

A man never sees all that his mother has been to him until it's too late to let her know that he sees it. - W D Howells

A mother takes twenty years to make a man of her boy, and another woman makes a fool of him in twenty minutes. - Robert Frost

There has never been, nor will there ever be, anything quite so special as the love between a mother and a son. - Unknown

I am one of those cliff-hanging Catholics. I don't believe in God, but I do believe that Mary was his mother. - Martin Sheen

When I moved out of my mom's house at 18 I was almost as sad to leave her sewing machine behind as anything else. - Beth Ditto

Hope is the companion of power, and mother of success; for who so hopes strongly has within him the gift of miracles. - Samuel Smiles

As a family we couldn't decide whether to have Grandma buried or cremated, so in the end we decided to let her live. - Gary Delaney

In most homes, the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. - Evan Esar

Over the years, I learned so much from mom. She taught me about the importance of home and history and family and tradition. - Martha Stewart

By embracing your mother wound as your yoga, you transform what has been a hindrance in your life into a teacher of the heart. - Phillip Moffitt

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple

A mother's heart, a mother's faith, and a mother's steadfast love were fashioned by the angels and sent from God above. - Unknown

The remarkable thing about my mother is that for 30 years she served us nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found. - Calvin Trillin

The rhythm of the footsteps, the sound of whatever is coming down the ladder is driving both me and my mom steadily toward peeing our pants. - Kendare Blake

Secretary: "It must be hard to lose your mother-in-law." WC Fields: "Yes it is, very hard. It's almost impossible." - WC Fields

The most beautiful word on the lips of mankind is the word 'Mother', and the most beautiful call is the call of 'My Mother'. - Kahlil Gibran

Blind dates are treacherous. You don't know who this person is. You wonder, "Should I call my grandma during coffee to get out of this?" - Alan Alda