#1 humor site on the 'net

Pals

Dressed up to be man's best friend

Pals thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Duck Dynasty starts new trend in pet clothing

QuotaBills
Old friends are best. - John Selden

Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

The dog is the god of frolic. - Henry Ward Beecher

Prosperity is full of friends. - Euripides

Never let the tail wag the dog. - Unknown

A hungry dog will eat dirty puddings. - Latin Proverb

Have no friends not equal to yourself. - Confucius

Good friends, like wine, get better with age. - Unknown

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

I was innocent, then my best friends came along. - Unknown

Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer. - Michael Corleone

All your friends are gonna be green with envious. - Archie Bunker

You can't trust the judgment of good friends. - Carl Sandburg

Dogs got personality. Personality goes a long way. - Quentin Tarantino

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

Telepathy: Being too lazy to give your friends a call - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Properly trained, a man can be dog's best friend. - Corey Ford

All my friends don't recognize me without a limp. - Kim Stewart

Be on your guard against a silent dog and still water. - Latin Proverb

If a man be great, even his dog will ear a proud look. - Japanese Proverb

The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Dogs do speak, but only to those who know how to listen. - Unknown

Animals are my friends... and I don't eat my friends. - George Bernard Shaw

He's the kind of man who picks his friends - to pieces. - Mae West

Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. - Roger Caras

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? - Steven Wright

Tell me who your friends are and I will tell you who you are. - Russian Proverb

It's the friends you can call up at 4:00 a.m. that matter. - Marlene Dietrich

Friends show their love in times of trouble, not in happiness. - Euripides

God gave us our relatives; thank God we can choose our friends. - Ethel Mumford

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

We make more enemies by what we say than friends by what we do. - John C Collins

If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one. - Andrew A. Rooney

We secure our friends not by accepting favors, but by doing them. - Thucydides

He hasn't an enemy in the world, but all his friends hate him. - Unknown

It is ever so much easier to be good if your clothes are fashionable. - L.M. Montgomery

Friends are lost by calling too often and by not calling often enough. - French Proverb

A dog has lots of friends because he wags his tail and not his tongue. - Unknown

A wise man gets more use from his enemies than a fool from his friends. - Baltasar Gracian

True friends don't judge each other, they judge other people together. - Unknown

Next to acquiring good friends, the best acquisition is that of good books. - Charles Caleb Colton

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

Without friends no one would choose to live, though he had all other goods. - Aristotle

The trees in Siberia are miles apart - that's why the dogs are so fast. - Bob Hope

We need old friends to help us grow old and new friends to help us stay young. - Letty Cottin Pogrebin

Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. - Jesus

Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother willing to let him have one. - Unknown

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later. - Unknown

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

Being honest may not get you many friends, but it'll always get you the right ones. - John Lennon

I was the class clown so I was used to performing and fooling around in front of my friends. - Dominic Monaghan

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx

I figure if I have my health, can pay the rent and I have my friends, I call it "content." - Lauren Bacall

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

Senescence begins
And middle-age ends,
The day your descendants
Outnumber your friends. - Ogden Nash

If men could see the epitaphs their friends write they would believe they had got into the wrong grave. - American Proverb

We challenge one another to be funnier and smarter ... It's the way friends make love to one another. - Annie Gottlieb

It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to our enemies, but just as much to stand up to our friends. - J K Rowling

Have your adventures, make your mistakes, and choose your friends poorly - all these make for great stories. - Chuck Palahniuk

Happiness is being content with what you have, living in freedom and liberty, having a good family life and good friends. - Divyanka Tripathi

We split from our common ancestor with the octopus half a billion years ago. And yet, you can make friends with an octopus. - Sy Montgomery

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

The space in a needle's eye is sufficient for two friends, but the whole world is scarcely big enough to hold two enemies. - Solomon Ibn Gabirol

You end up as you deserve. In old age you must put up with the face, the friends, the health, and the children you have earned. - Fay Weldon

I once sent a dozen of my friends a telegram saying "flee at once - all is discovered." They all left town immediately. - Mark Twain

Though my friends envied me because I always seemed so cheerful and confident, I was secretly terrified of practically everything. - Erica Jong

Wear a smile and have friends; wear a scowl and have wrinkles. What do we live for if not to make the world less difficult for each other? - George Eliot

What is it about friendship that makes being among friends so much richer than being among the most accomplished and interesting strangers? - Sandy Sheehy


Be Anything You Want

Tractor Pull

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Canadian Ice Shrub

I Eat Soldiers For Breakfast

Toepener

No-Lake Picture

Logging Chairlift

Milkshake Desweetener

Dog Marathon

Global Warming Protest

Canadian Fast Food

Wienermobile Crash

Caribou Walking

Human Pixels

Ruling On Criticism

The New Canada

Pail Face

Redneck DoorBells

Psychic Fair

Panda Push

Lunch Apple

Protective Wings

Socket To Me