#1 humor site on the 'net

Pals

Dressed up to be man's best friend

Pals thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Duck Dynasty starts new trend in pet clothing

QuotaBills
My friends are my estate. - Emily Dickinson

Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker

The dog is the god of frolic. - Henry Ward Beecher

Uniform: Sheep's clothing - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A hard dog to keep on the porch. - Hillary Clinton

Dogs never bite me. Just humans. - Marilyn Monroe

Friends are the sunshine of life. - John Hay

A dog has the soul of a philosopher. - Plato

A hungry dog will eat dirty puddings. - Latin Proverb

An angry dog is best led by its tail. - Unknown

A selfie a day keeps the friends away. - Unknown

Throw physic to the dogs; I'll none of it. - William Shakespeare

Prosperity makes friends; adversity tries them. - Publilius Syrus

Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate. - Thomas Jones

Alzeimer's Advantage: New friends every day. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Lingerie: The only clothing where less costs more - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Distrust any enterprise that requires new clothes. - Henry David Thoreau

In the cookie of life, friends are chocolate chips. - Salman Rushdie

One trained dog equals 60 search-and-rescue workers. - Charles Stoehr

Properly trained, a man can be dog's best friend. - Corey Ford

If a man be great, even his dog will ear a proud look. - Japanese Proverb

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. - Andy Rooney

Hot Dog: The only animal that feeds the hand that bites it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

He's the kind of man who picks his friends - to pieces. - Mae West

You don't have to hold your stomach in for real friends. - Unknown

There's no word yet for old friends who've just met. - Jim Henson

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

Tell me who your friends are and I will tell you who you are. - Russian Proverb

God gave us our relatives; thank God we can choose our friends. - Ethel Mumford

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

He will never have true friends who is afraid of making enemies. - William Hazlitt

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits

No man should live where he can hear his neighbor's dog bark. - Nathaniel Macon

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

A woman seldom asks advice before she has bought her wedding clothes. - Joseph Addison

I get my exercise running to the funerals of my friends who exercise. - Barry Gray

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

Friends are lost by calling too often and by not calling often enough. - French Proverb

Don't abuse your friends and expect them to consider it criticism. - Ed Howe

A dog has lots of friends because he wags his tail and not his tongue. - Unknown

A wise man gets more use from his enemies than a fool from his friends. - Baltasar Gracian

Tweeting is like sending out cool telegrams to your friends once a week. - Tom Hanks

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

Advice from your friends is like the weather, some of it is good, some of it is bad. - Unknown

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. - Winston Churchill

Being honest may not get you many friends, but it'll always get you the right ones. - John Lennon

Fine clothes are good only as they supply the want of other means of procuring respect. - Samuel Johnson

Never make excuses. Your friends don't need them and your foes won't believe them. - John Wooden

When my friends and I played cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker. - Robin Williams

We cherish our friends not for their ability to amuse us, but for our ability to amuse them. - Evelyn Waugh

If two friends ask you to judge a dispute, don't accept, because you will lose one friend. - St. Augustine

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

I like to put on a wig or a fake mustache and do something silly with friends, do a little dance. - Tom Lenk

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx

I figure if I have my health, can pay the rent and I have my friends, I call it "content." - Lauren Bacall

We read that we ought to forgive our enemies; but we do not read that we ought to forgive our friends. - Cosimo de Medici

Lately all my friends are worried they're turning into their fathers. I'm worried I'm not. - Dan Zevin

The drink and I have been friends for so long, it would be a pity for me to leave without one last kiss. - Turlough O'Carolan

As yet, Bernard Shaw hasn't become prominent enough to have any enemies, but none of his friends like him. - Oscar Wilde

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is certain dogs I know will go to heaven, and very, very few people. - James Thurber

A man with a career can have no time to waste upon his wife and friends; he has to devote it wholly to his enemies. - John Hobbes

If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. - Alfred N Whitehead

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

My candle burns at both ends,
It will not last the night;
But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends -
It gives a lovely light! - Edna St Vincent Millay

What is it about friendship that makes being among friends so much richer than being among the most accomplished and interesting strangers? - Sandy Sheehy

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

If you go out looking for friends, you're going to find they are very scarce. If you go out to be a friend, you'll find them everywhere. - Zig Ziglar

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash


Horsepower vs Torque

Filling Up Is OverRated

Flywood

Ukraine Aid

Handicap Motorcyclist

Auto Warranty: New Extend-ed Coverage

Messerschmitt

UNinvolved

Plane Oops!

Manitoba Home Security System

Outdoor Pool

Working From Home

Snowbound Train

Smirnoff Women

Redneck Dent Repair

Cocktail Shirt

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Boy George or Boy Gorge?

Tall Guy Bike

Lord Voldemort Rock

Illusionary

Copperhead Tree

Dream Big

Spot the Man's Head Hidden in the Coffee Beans