#1 humor site on the 'net

Read The Fine Print

The first people not to read Apple's terms and conditions

Read The Fine Print thanks to Warren Ralston

A sign guide to legal due diligence in a Church setting

QuotaBills
The best thing to break is a contract. - WC Fields

Until Eve arrived, this was a man's world. - Richard Armour

Don't think your condition is good enough; KNOW IT! - Unknown

Panic is not an effective long-term organizing strategy. - Starhawk

Conservatives define themselves in terms of what they oppose. - George Will

An apple a day keeps anyone away if you throw it hard enough. - Unknown

Adam was the luckiest man in the world - he had no mother-in-law. - Sholom Aleichem

Millions saw the apple fall, but Newton was the one who asked why. - Bernard Baruch

Science is a differential equation. Religion is a boundary condition. - Alan Turing

Companies need connections to the markets to create long-term loyalty. - Charlene Bernoff

Civilization is a movement and not a condition, a voyage and not a harbor. - Arnold J. Toynbee

Behold the warranty. The bold print giveth and the fine print taketh away. - Unknown

In terms of being late or not starting at all, then it's never too late. - Alison Headley

An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible. - Alfred A. Knopf

Adam, the first great benefactor of our race. He brought death into the world. - Mark Twain

No object is so beautiful that, under certain conditions, it will not look ugly. - Oscar Wilde

Under the English legal system you are innocent until you are shown to be Irish. - Ted Whitehead

Work and play are words used to describe the same thing under differing conditions. - Mark Twain

Being defeated is often a temporary condition. Giving up is what makes it permanent. - Marilyn vos Savant

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

What a good thing Adam had. When he said a good thing, he knew nobody had said it before. - Mark Twain

I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up. - Groucho Marx

Happiness doesn't depend on any external conditions, it is governed by our mental attitude. - Dale Carnegie

Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity. - Irving Kristol

For a war to be just three conditions are necessary - public authority, just cause, right motive. - Ernest Hemingway

I wish to be cremated. One tenth of my ashes shall be given to my agent, as written in our contract. - Groucho Marx

The role of the teacher is to create the conditions for invention rather than provide ready-made knowledge. - Seymour Papert

The mind of a bigot is like the pupil of the eye. The more light you shine on it, the more it will contract. - Oliver Wendell Homes, Jr.

The legal system is often a mystery, and we, its priests, preside over rituals baffling to everyday citizens. - Henry G. Miller

No oppression is so heavy or lasting as that which is inflicted by the perversion and exorbitance of legal authority. - Joseph Addison

Spare the rod and spoil the child - that is true. But, beside the rod, keep an apple to give him when he has done well. - Martin Luther

There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them. - Denis Waitley

There are two kinds of fears: rational and irrational- or in simpler terms, fears that make sense and fears that don't. - Lemony Snicket

If you think in terms of a year, plant a seed; if in terms of ten years, plant trees; if in terms of 100 years, teach the people. - Confucius

Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition, is not only a waste of energy but the worst habit you could possibly have. - Dale Carnegie

I see history as really cyclical in terms of the intense idealism, and the desire to create a better life outside of societal norms. - Lauren Groff

You don't need endless time and perfect conditions. Do it now. Do it today. Do it for twenty minutes and watch your heart start beating. - Barbara Sher

No theory is good unless it permits, not rest, but the greatest work. No theory is good except on condition that one use it to go on beyond. - Andre Gide

We hear voices in solitude, we never hear in the hurry and turmoil of life; we receive counsels and comforts we get under no other condition. - Amelia Barr

I mean, there's no arguing. There is no anything. There is no beating around the bush. "You're fired" is a very strong term. - Donald Trump


Snow Wall

Cold One

Baby Chat

Window Cleaning On The Edge

Father Time Snowman

Back Pain

No Extras Massage

Gooooooooooogle Air

Hot Tub Hangups

Scenery Cut and Paste

Origin of the Whoopee Cushion

Better With A Beard

Canadian Winter Smile

Monkey Morning

Snow Geese

Walk The Line

Darth Vader Cool

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Cutting Edge Table

Wine Signs

Ring Seating

Snow Aerobics

25 Toes

Wedding Cake Dress