Redneck Water Filter

Water rusts pipes. - WC Fields

Out of water, I am nothing. - Duke Kahanamoku

Water is the only drink for a wise man. - Henry David Thoreau

Kettle Drum: What musicians boil water in - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Sacrilege: Shelf for bottles of holy water - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody. - Mark Twain

Sometimes I drink water just to surprise my liver. - WC Fields

The scalded dog fears hot water, and afterwards, cold. - Italian Proverb

I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle. - Mitch Hedberg

I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean. - G K Chesterton

I moved to Florida because you don't have to shovel water. - James Randi

Water, air, and cleanliness are the chief articles in my pharmacy. - Napoleon Bonaparte

If his IQ slips any lower, we'll have to water him twice a day. - Molly Ivins

You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it. - WC Fields

Boat: A hole in the water surrounded by wood into which one pours money - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. - WC Fields

An entire ocean can't sink a ship unless it allows the water inside. - Donna Smith

The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl. - Dave Barry

You don't drown by falling into water. You only drown if you stay there. - Zig Ziglar

A woman is like a teabag. Only in hot water do you realize how strong she is. - Nancy Reagan

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments. - Chris Rock

Lake: Large body of water into which a kid will jump should his friends do so - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

Start writing, no matter what. The water does not flow until the faucet is turned on. - Louis L'Amour

The dignity of movement of an iceberg is due to only one ninth of it being above water. - Ernest Hemingway

Before enlightenment: chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment: chop wood, carry water. - Zen Buddhist Saying

A wise man adapts himself to circumstances, as water shapes itself to the vessel that contains it. - Chinese Proverb

When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either use one more club or two more balls. - Unknown

The rasp of the respirator's filter were about as comforting as Darth Vader reading a bedtime story. - Andy McNab

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

Going without food or water will kill the body, but the lack of relationship will kill the minds and spirit. - David Jeremiah

Sailor: 1. A man who makes his living on water but never touches it on shore; 2. A wolf in ship's clothing. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Be like a duck, paddling and working very hard inside the water, but what everyone sees is a smiling and calm face. - Manoj Arora

Some lawyers are like unto the camel, which, before drinking out of a brook, maketh the water turbid with his foot. - Adolphus W Ward

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

After all, when a stone is dropped into a pond, the water continues quivering even after the stone has sunk to the bottom. - Arthur Golden

How come if you mix flour and water together you get glue? And when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go? - Rita Rudner

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

Advice from a tree:
- Stand tall and proud
- Go out on a limb
- Remember your roots
- Drink plenty of water
- Enjoy the view - Unknown