#1 humor site on the 'net

Restored Beauty

Putting your best face forward

Restored Beauty thanks to Jim Serritella

Personal stories of people who fought cancer at Cancer Treatment Centers in North America

QuotaBills
Laughter is the best medicine. - Joe-kster

The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker

I have a brain and a uterus, and I use both. - Patricia Shroeder

The brain is a commodity used to fertilize ideas. - Elbert Hubbard

A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington

Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food. - Hippocrates

My music isn't just music - it's medicine. - Unknown

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards. - Henny Youngman

A nurse will always give us hope, an angel with a stethoscope. - Terri Guillemets

Document: Repeating what your Doctor told you in your own words - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain. - Edward de Bono

That's your best friend and your worst enemy - your own brain. - Fred Durst

The patient is not likely to recover who makes the doctor his heir. - Thomas Fuller

I don't consider myself bald. I'm simply taller than my hair. - Tom Sharp

Save one life, you're a hero. Save 100 lives, you're a nurse. - Unknown

Financial ruin from medical bills is almost exclusively an American disease. - Roul Turley

To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for. - James H. Boren

Co-Operation: An exchange between a woman and a man in which she coos and he operates - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The brain is only one condition out of many on which intellectual manifestations depend. - Thomas Henry Huxley

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living. - Dr. Seuss

The person who reads too much and uses his brain too little will fall into lazy habits of thinking. - Albert Einstein

You might be a nurse if you firmly believe that "too stupid to live" should be a diagnosis. - Unknown

We cannot embrace God's forgiveness if we are so busy clinging to past wounds and nursing old grudges. - T D Jakes

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor. - Abe Lemons

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

Our brain is mapping the world. Often that map is distorted, but it's a map with constant immediate sensory input. - E.O. Wilson

A man's brain originally is like a little empty attic, and you have to stock it with such furniture as you choose. - Arthur Conan Doyle

The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler

It is astonishing with how little reading a doctor can practice medicine, but is not astonishing how badly he may do it. - William Osler

My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle

I'm not saying I'm gonna change the world, but I guarantee that I will spark the brain that will change the world. - Tupac Shakur

It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw

When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield

Paul Revere was warning the British about gun control, and George Washington apparently was crossing the Delaware to bomb an abortion clinic. - Bill Maher


Cow Nap

Ear Chip

Sleep With Us

Puppy Taco

Fresh Air Computing

Koalified

How Much Time Left

Expandable Equation

Devoted Husband

Statue of Libertea

Beaver Stretching

Social Media Explained

Famous Equations

Ain't Mowing the Lawn Anymore

Crocpox

Deer Me!

Inverted Helicopter

Water Hat

NASCAR Fan - Diehard Category

Busted

Build It - They Will Come

Exhausted Baby

Monkeypox II

Overloaded Bookshop