#1 humor site on the 'net

Science Fiction Recipes

Recipes that come to a sad conclusion

Science Fiction Recipes thanks to Steve Ingram

Diet plans that almost work

QuotaBills
I'm a fat anorexic. - Kiri Te Kanawa

Laughter is by definition healthy. - Doris Lessing

Mine is the least fat diet in the world. - Pierre Dukan

Recipe for a happy husband: Fake and Bake. - Unknown

Smoking cures weight problems... eventually. - Steven Wright

Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you. - Joan Rivers

I'm just one stomach flu away from my goal weight. - The Devil Wears Prada

I don't trust any diet that doesn't allow sugar. - Bethenny Frankel

Love is or it ain't. Thin love ain't love at all. - Toni Morrison

The first couple of days on the detox diet aren't pleasant. - Carol Vorderman

I don't so much mind being old, as I mind being fat and old. - Peter Gabriel

Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise. - Benjamin Franklin

Never let success get to your head. Never let failure get to your health. - Unknown

There is nothing more beautiful in this world than a healthy, wise old man. - Lin Yutang

One of the major goals of health insurance reform is to bring down the cost. - Valerie Jarrett

Faith and knowledge lean largely upon each other in the practice of medicine. - Peter Mere Latham

The majority of my diet is made up of the foods that my kid didn't finish. - Carrie Underwood

I am on a ketos diet so I avoid sugar, dairy products, wheat, grain or pulses. - Puneet Issar

Observe your dog: if he's fat, then you're not getting enough exercise. - Evan Esar

Who ever hears of fat men heading a riot, or herding together in turbulent mobs? - Washington Irving

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

"The Hunchback Of Notre Dame" had the big fat English actor, Charles Lawson. - Archie Bunker

Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie. - Jim Davis

A recipe is only a theme, which an intelligent cook can play each time with a variation. - Madame Benoit

Coaching doesn't make sick people well - it helps healthy people become extra-ordinary. - Thomas Leonard

Life, if you're fat, is a minefield - you have to pick your way, otherwise you blow up. - Miriam Margolyes

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. - Joe E Lewis

I'm on a strict liquid diet: Mimosas for breakfast, Margaritas for lunch, Martinis for dinner. - Unknown

I figure if I have my health, can pay the rent and I have my friends, I call it "content." - Lauren Bacall

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "Cigarettes contain fat." - Dave Barry

If I go on a diet and work out, I'm always in a bad mood. I'd rather be a little heavier but nice. - Salma Hayek

Baloney is the unvarnished lie laid on so thick you hate it. Blarney is flattery laid on so thin you love it. - Fulton J Sheen

When wealth is lost, nothing is lost. When health is lost, something is lost. When character is lost, all is lost. - Rev. Billy Graham

America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight. - Unknown

Dieting is not a sprint, it's a marathon. If you celebrate the small victories, you will eventually win the war. - Ian K Smith

Every time you use the word 'healthy,' you lose. The key is to make yummy, delicious food that happens to be healthy. - Marcus Samuelsson

It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd druther not. - Mark Twain

I'm off the diet, but not the treadmill. I speak as someone who's attempted to lose weight and get fit thrice before in my life. - Ronnie Screwvala

Fishing Journal: An imaginative work of sub-literature in which the angler records the weight, length, and species of fish he didn't catch - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


Good Boy

British Tea Party

Roadside Assistance

Chair Boy

Cheers Beer

African Airstrip

Horsepower vs Torque

Filling Up Is OverRated

Flywood

Ukraine Aid

Handicap Motorcyclist

Auto Warranty: New Extend-ed Coverage

Messerschmitt

UNinvolved

Plane Oops!

Manitoba Home Security System

Outdoor Pool

Working From Home

Snowbound Train

Smirnoff Women

Redneck Dent Repair

Cocktail Shirt

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Boy George or Boy Gorge?