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Science Fiction Recipes

Recipes that come to a sad conclusion

Science Fiction Recipes thanks to Steve Ingram

Diet plans that almost work

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Americans like fat books and thin women. - Russell Baker

Recipe for a happy husband: Fake and Bake. - Unknown

Have great, secret, big, fat hopes for yourself. - Gloria Vanderbilt

I'm not gaining weight. I'm living large. - Unknown

The more you weight the harder you are to kidnap. - Unknown

My weight is perfect for my height - which varies. - Unknown

Anybody who doesn't like this book is healthy. - Groucho Marx

The wish for healing has always been half of health. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory. - Albert Schweitzer

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

If you ignore your health for long enough, it'll go away. - Unknown

The cardiologist's diet: - If it tastes good, spit it out. - Unknown

Where there is laughter there is always more health than sickness. - Phyllis Bottome

There is no curing a sick man who believes himself to be in health. - Henri Amiel

I find there is only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people. - Rodney Dangerfield

'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'. - Dave Barry

The key to a healthy lawn is to take care of what happens below ground. - Mike Bechtle

Nobody likes insurance companies, especially health insurance companies. - P.J. O'Rourke

I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks. - Totie Fields

Never let success get to your head. Never let failure get to your health. - Unknown

There is nothing more beautiful in this world than a healthy, wise old man. - Lin Yutang

No disease that can be treated by diet should be treated by any other means. - Maimonides

In nothing do men more nearly approach the gods than in giving health to men. - Cicero

A mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary. - Dorothy Fisher

A man's health can be judged by which he takes two at a time - pills or stairs. - Joan Welsh

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt. - Erma Bombeck

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it. - Jackie Gleason

If you're not paying for it through the health plan, you pay for it in the emergency room. - David Lehman

If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free. - P.J. O'Rourke

Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship. - Buddha

I'm on a strict liquid diet: Mimosas for breakfast, Margaritas for lunch, Martinis for dinner. - Unknown

If fat people just gave skinny people more food, we could solve obesity and hunger at the same time. - Ashton Kutcher

Many of our fears are tissue-paper-thin, and a single courageous step would carry us clear through them. - Brendan Francis

Nobody can fail to lose weight in the jungle, unless they've got a secret stash of pork pies somewhere. - Colin Baker

I refuse to believe that trading recipes is silly. Tuna-fish casserole is at least as real as corporate stock. - Barbara Harrison

When wealth is lost, nothing is lost. When health is lost, something is lost. When character is lost, all is lost. - Rev. Billy Graham

I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on. - Jean Kerr

In soap, fatty acids made from boiling pork bone fat are used as a hardening agent, but also for giving it a pearl-like effect. - Christien Meindertsma

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, "Well, that's not going to happen." - Unknown

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright


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