#1 humor site on the 'net

Sun Skin Tone

What to do if your skin colour matches the sign

Sun Skin Tone thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Sun tanning safety tips

QuotaBills
I surf to get tan. - Shane Dorian

Could you patent the sun? - Jonas Salk

Suntan: A pigment of your imagination. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Wear your heart on your skin in this life. - Sylvia Plath

Lend a horse, and you may have back his skin. - English Proverb

Even dirt glitters when the sun is shining upon it. - Goethe

Following the light of the sun, we left the Old World. - Christopher Columbus

The time to repair the roof is when the sun is shining. - John F Kennedy

I'll tell you how the sun rose - a ribbon at a time. - Emily Dickinson

Beauty may be skin deep, but ugly goes clear to the bone. - Redd Foxx

I've had Irish skin from the time I was a young girl. - Lara Flynn Boyle

Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you. - Maori Proverb

Keep your eyes on the sun and you will not see the shadows. - Australian Aborigine Saying

Civilization is the lamb's skin in which barbarism masquerades. - T.B. Aldrich

Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon, and the truth. - Buddha

We live under the sun, but our destiny is beyond its rising and setting. - David Jeremiah

A man hath no better thing under the sun than to eat, drink, and be merry. - Ecclesiastes 8:15

If the words you spoke appeared on your skin would you still be beautiful? - Unknown

I need the starshine of your heavenly eyes,
After the day's great sun. - Charles Hanson Towne

The earth has a skin and that skin has diseases. One of its diseases is called Man. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

My mother is Irish, my father is black and Venezuelan, and me - I'm tan, I guess. - Mariah Carey

It's a good thing that beauty is only skin deep, or I'd be rotten to the core. - Phyllis Diller

Don't cry when the sun is gone, because the tears won't let you see the stars. - Violeta Parra

Truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a time, but it ain't goin' away. - Elvis Presley

Beauty, to me, is about being comfortable in your own skin. That, or a kick-ass red lipstick. - Gwyneth Paltrow

The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin. - Mark Twain

Some painters transform the sun into a yellow spot, others transform a yellow spot into the sun. - Pablo Picasso

When it rains, it pours; but soon, the sun shines again. Stay positive. Better days are on their way. - Unknown

The sun always comes up. Spring always comes after winter. The river always reaches the ocean. Always. - Maxime Lagace

The sun never sets on the British Empire. But it rises every morning. The sky must get awfully crowded. - Steven Wright

If you cry because the sun has gone out of your life, your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars. - Rabindranath Tagore

When you are skinning your customers, you should leave some skin on to grow so that you can skin them again. - Nikita S Khrushchev

Honolulu - it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother. - Ken Dodd

It would be a terrific innovation if you could get your mind to stretch a little further tan the next wisecrack. - Katharine Hepburn

A perfect summer day is when the sun is shining, the breeze is blowing, the birds are singing, and the lawn mower is broken. - James Dent

Real angels don't have gossamer white robes and cherubic skin. They have calloused hands and smell of the days' sweat. - Richard Evans

Aim at the sun, and you may not reach it; but your arrow will fly far higher than if aimed at an object on a level with yourself. - Joel Hawes

I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else. - C S Lewis

I glanced out the window at the signs of spring. The sky was almost blue, the trees were almost budding, the sun was almost bright. - Millard Kaufman

Summer is a drag because even normal people become obsessed with their bodies. A bad bathing suit can humiliate you more tan anything else in life. - Conan O'Brien


WipeOut

Turtle Truck

How To Burn Fat

Unplugged

Praying & Preying Mantis

Good Driver

Overpass Passover

Fire Starter

Sinus Remedy - How To Clear Out Your Nostrils

Auto Strap

Never Run a Red Light

Bee Safe

Hummers Only Look Tough

Tactical Texas

Defence Budget Cuts

Welfare State

No Flies On Me

Stick Family Meal

Wet Floor

Lord Of The Watch

Close Encounters of the Whale Kind

Military Watch Tower

No Go Intersection

Public Transportation In Scotland