#1 humor site on the 'net

Texas Cobra Boots

Bubba's Redneck cowboy boots have a venomous kick

Texas Cobra Boots thanks to Dick Hogarth

QuotaBills
Texas is as odd as it is vast. - Henry Rollins

We ate everything but his boots. - Unknown

Olfactory: Texas petroleum refinery - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A cat bitten once by a snake dreads even rope. - Arab Proverb

Parts of Texas look like Kansas with a goiter. - Unknown

I never saw anything funnier than Texas politics. - Molly Ivins

It's hotter than a snake's ass in a wagon rut. - Robin Williams

Texas is a hotbed of insanely good bands and musicians. - Henry Rollins

In plain Texas talk, it's 'do the right thing'. - Ross Perot

I'm super laid back. I'm from Texas. I love my family. - Selena Gomez

In Texas it's always hot, dry, sunny, not a cloud in the sky. - Piper Perabo

Washable: What a cowboy does, very carefully, with soap and water - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A lie travels round the world while truth is putting her boots on. - French proverb

The folks in Mississippi are saying, 'Thank God for Texas.' - Kinky Friedman

If Adam and Eve were alive today, they would probably sue the snake. - Bern Williams

You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans. - George Carlin

When the snake is in the house, one need not discuss the matter at length. - African Saying

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch

There's man all over for you, blaming on his boots the fault of his feet. - Samuel Beckett

Keep your bike in good repair: motorcycle boots are not comfortable for walking. - Unknown

The landscape of Texas is in all my work. It's that light; it's that sky. - Robert Wilson

Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may. - Sam Houston

How can you look at the Texas legislature and still believe in intelligent design? - Kinky Friedman

I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy. - WC Fields

If a man's from Texas, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him by asking? - John Gunther

Some folks look at me and see a certain swagger, which in Texas is called 'walking.' - George W. Bush

A good lie will have traveled half way around the world while the truth is putting on her boots. - Mark Twain

The definition of insanity in Texas is so insane that it's impossible to be insane in Texas. - Malcolm McDowell

I'm from Texas, and one of the reasons I like Texas is because there's no one in control. - Willie Nelson

Most of my memories of Texas are of mosquitoes, watermelons, crickets, and my brother teasing me. - Robin Wright

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake. - WC Fields

Bond reflected that good Americans were fine people and that most of them seemed to come from Texas. - Ian Fleming

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry

You can take the girl out of Texas but not the Texas out of the girl and ultimately not the girl out of Texas. - Janine Turner

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff

Look out how you use proud words. When you let proud words go, it is not easy to call them back. They wear long boots, hard boots. - Carl Sandburg

Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots. - Hoosier Farmer

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Edible: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


Skull Violins

Finger Phone

Family Bike

Airless See-Through Tires

Aussie Motorcycle

Statue Selfie

Bacon Sandwich

Elephant Hand

Unless Your Dog Can Do This

Dragon Buoy

Cat On A Hot Tin Roof

Bird Melons

Local Crabs

Black Golfer

Ostrich Imprint

Tea Party Weapon

Extra Space Bed

Unattended Children

ThrowYo

Cell Phone Warning

Umbrella Protection and Non-Protection

Husband Creche

Undertaker Bike

Road Sign Dictionary