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To Mother

To those who miss their mother on Mother's Day

To Mother thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Special memories on Mother's Day

Thoughts of the many sacrifices Mom made over the years

QuotaBills
Grammatical Error: When Grandma screws up - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Fearlessness is the mother of reinvention. - Arianna Huffington

Necessity is the mother of taking chances. - Mark Twain

You trust your mother, but you cut the cards. - Unknown

An ounce of mother is worth a tone of priest. - Spanish Proverb

An ounce of mother is worth a pound of clergy. - Spanish Proverb

My grandmother made dying her life's work. - Hugh Leonard

A mother understands what a child does not say. - Jewish Proverb

Antisocial: Mother's sister being friendly. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Mother-In-Law Sandwich: Cold shoulder and tongue - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A rich child often sits in a poor mother's lap. - Danish Proverb

The best part of him ran down his mother's legs. - Jackie Gleason

This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother. - Ted Walsh

Mirror, mirror, on the wall, I am my mother after all. - Unknown

For when a child is born the mother also is born again. - Gilbert Parker

A mother is one to whom you hurry when you are troubled. - Emily Dickinson

Air pollution is turning Mother Nature prematurely gray. - Irv Kupcinet

All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel mother. - Abraham Lincoln

Life doesn't come with a manual. It comes with a mother. - Unknown

A mother's arms are more comforting than anyone else's. - Princess Diana

Blaming mother is just a negative way of clinging to her still. - Nancy Friday

Sweater: A garment worn by a child when his mother feels chilly. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Biplane: The advice I got from my mother on purchasing underwear. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap? - George Carlin

I know enough to know that when you're in a pickle... call Mom. - Jennifer Garner

Whatsoever was the father of a disease, an ill diet was the mother. - George Herbert

A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but you mean your mother. - Unknown

My grandmother took a bath every year, whether she was dirty or not. - Brendan Behan

I unapologetically and unabashedly am deeply biased toward my mother. - Chelsea Clinton

My religious background is that my mother is a Christian Dior Scientist. - Robin Williams

My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it. - Mark Twain

I'd like to be the ideal mother, but I'm too busy raising my kids. - Unknown

The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother. - WC Fields

There never was a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him asleep. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Today is the anniversary of you being expelled from your mother's uterus. - Unknown

Mother love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible. - Marion C. Garretty

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

Your mother's down there throwing a monkey wrench into the halls of justice. - Archie Bunker

Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother willing to let him have one. - Unknown

The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - Henry Ward Beecher

I want to stay curled and cosied and chocolated... forever in my mother's arms. - Sanober Khan

A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest. - Irish Proverb

My mother is no spring chicken although she has got as many chemicals in her as one. - Edna Everage

My nickname is 'Mom', but my full name is 'Mom Mom Mom Mom Mom Mom.' - Unknown

My perspective on my mother has changed immensely. She was a lot taller when I was younger. - Howie Mandel

When a man who is drinking neat gin starts talking about his mother he is past all argument. - C.S. Forester

If you have a mom, there is nowhere you are likely to go where a prayer has not already been. - Robert Brault

The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness. - Honore De Balzac

A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity. - Agatha Christie

Once you're a mom, you're always a mom. It's like riding a bike, you never forget. - Taraji P Henson

Said the daughter: "I don't have to help my Mom with the housework. She knows how." - Unknown

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

Grandma always made you feel she had been waiting to see you all day and now the day was complete. - Marcy DeMaree

The older I grow, the more I realize that my mother is the best 'best friend' that I ever had. - Unknown

You really don't need to study how to change a diaper. As a new mom, you learn pretty darn quickly! - Ivanka Trump

No man succeeds without a good woman behind him. Wife or mother, if it is both, he is twice blessed indeed. - Godfrey Winn

My mother always used to say, "The older you get, the better you get. Unless you're a banana." - Betty White

My mother always told me I wouldn't amount to anything because I procrastinate. I said, Just wait. - Judy Tenuta

Drunk Man: "I can't bear fools."
Dorothy Parker: "Apparently your mother could." - Dorothy Parker

A mother takes twenty years to make a man of her boy, and another woman makes a fool of him in twenty minutes. - Robert Frost

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you. - Nora Ephron

I am one of those cliff-hanging Catholics. I don't believe in God, but I do believe that Mary was his mother. - Martin Sheen

My Mother: She is beautiful, softened at the edges and tempered with a spine of steel. I want to grow old and be like her. - Jodi Picoult

In most homes, the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. - Evan Esar

To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power. Or the climbing, falling colors of a rainbow. - Maya Angelou

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple

My son really has the spirit of Valentine's Day. When he was in college, he used to send his mother a heart-shaped box of laundry. - Milton Berle

Never play cards with a man called Doc, never eat at a place called Mom's, and never sleep with a woman whose troubles are worse than your own. - Nelson Algren

Blind dates are treacherous. You don't know who this person is. You wonder, "Should I call my grandma during coffee to get out of this?" - Alan Alda

Car Pool: Complicated system of transportation where Mom always winds up going the furthest with the biggest bunch of kids who have had the most sugar - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


Welfare State

No Flies On Me

Stick Family Meal

Wet Floor

Lord Of The Watch

Close Encounters of the Whale Kind

Military Watch Tower

No Go Intersection

Public Transportation In Scotland

Guarded Nights

Financial Meltdown

Fox Kabob

Microwaved Bulb... Watts You Won't See

Saks-e Parking Job

Griller Bees

Texting While Cycling

Redneck Manicure

Police Profiling In Canada

Tree Stand

No Worries

Hospital Gown Insurance

Facebook Red Light

Redneck Speed Bump

Scientific Driving Test