Unfortunate Sign Burnouts

A light heart lives long. - William Shakespeare

He lights up a room when he leaves it. - Henny Youngman

What is to give light must endure burning. - Viktor Frankl

A proverb is much light condensed in one flash. - Simmons

Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind. - Terry Pratchett

Sometimes that light at the end of the tunnel is a train. - Charles Barkley

How many people does it take to change a searchlight bulb? - Steven Wright

It is better to light one candle than to curse the darkness. - Chinese Proverb

The sign said "eight items or less." So I changed my name to Les. - Steven Wright

Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light. - Helen Keller

We cannot hold a torch to light another's path without brightening our own. - Unknown

I got something important here to read and sign and I gotta consecrate on that. - Archie Bunker

Treat your friends as you do your pictures, and place them in their best light. - Jennie Jerome Churchill

Truth is like heat or light; its vibrations are endless, and are endlessly felt. - Margaret Deland

Who is more foolish, the child afraid of the dark or the man afraid of the light? - Maurice Freehill

The landscape of Texas is in all my work. It's that light; it's that sky. - Robert Wilson

A good teacher is like a candle - it consumes itself to light the way for others. - Unknown

If you're not failing now and again, it's a sign you're playing it safe. - Woody Allen

Contradiction is not a sign of falsity, nor the lack of contradiction a sign of truth. - Blaise Pascal

Oh say can you see, by the dawn's early light. What so proudly we hailed. Of thee I sing. - Archie Bunker

If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk? - Laurence J. Peter

We have been too long in darkness. Once already we have been in the light, and we want it again. - Alexander Dubcek

The art of art, the glory of expression, and the sunshine of the light of letters, is simplicity. - Walt Whitman

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank. - Woody Allen

If the sign on your heart says, "WELCOME", the love will come pouring in from everywhere. - Susan Jeffers

Fathers are like a lighthouse - when there is fog his children can always depend on seeing the light. - Unknown

I saw a sign: "Rest Area 25 Miles". That's pretty big. Some people must be really tired. - Steven Wright

The mind of a bigot is like the pupil of the eye. The more light you shine on it, the more it will contract. - Oliver Wendell Homes, Jr.

In faith there is enough light for those who want to believe and enough shadows to blind those who don't. - Blaise Pascal

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

Who is apt, on occasion, to assign a multitude of reasons when one will do? This is a sure sign of weakness in argument. - Harriet Martineau

It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off. - Woody Allen

Human beings will line up for miles to buy a bucket of catastrophes, but don't try selling sunshine and light; you'll go broke. - Chuck Jones

My candle burns at both ends,
It will not last the night;
But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends -
It gives a lovely light! - Edna St Vincent Millay

If I were a flower,
humming bird would be my favourite bee
And If I were blind,
the light of darkness I'd love to see - Munia Khan

You are a divine being. You matter, you count. You come from realms of unimaginable power and light, and you will return to those realms. - Terence McKenna

Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language?
One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap. - Red Skelton

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller

If I could store lightnings in jars, I'd sell them to sick fireflies to light their way. Only they have nothing to pay for it with but life. - Will Advise

Think while walking, walk while thinking, and let writing be but the light pause, as the body on a walk rests in contemplation of wide open spaces. - Frederic Gros