Wet Nose Fixer

Every dog has his day. - Unknown

Sickness soaks the purse. - International Proverb

Health food makes me sick. - Calvin Trillin

Sleeping dogs bark the loudest. - Archie Bunker

Dogs never bite me. Just humans. - Marilyn Monroe

Boredom is a sickness of the soul. - Unknown

Dogs have masters. Cats have staff. - Unknown

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Space ails us moderns: we are sick with space. - Robert Frost

I want my food dead. Not sick, not dying - dead. - Oscar Wilde

Hackchoo: When you sneeze and cough at the same time - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Hope is medicine for a soul that's sick and tired. - Eric Swensson

I'll get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too! - The Wizard of Oz

Better to be the head of a dog than the tail of a lion. - English Proverb

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. - Andy Rooney

No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish. - Kin Hubbard

A hot dog at the ballpark is better than a steak at the Ritz. - Humphrey Bogart

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman

Elixir: What a dog does to his owner when she gives him a bone - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

No man should live where he can hear his neighbor's dog bark. - Nathaniel Macon

Where there is laughter there is always more health than sickness. - Phyllis Bottome

I have nothing against dogs. I just hate rugs that go squish-squish. - Phyllis Diller

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

Acting is merely the art of keeping a large group of people from coughing. - Ralph Richardson

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself. - Josh Billings

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

I don't want a flu jab. I like getting flu. It gives me something else to complain about. - David Letterman

Don't make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans, or they'll treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott

My wife is a real Puritan. She thinks licking the stamp on the envelope of a Valentine is foreplay. - Milton Berle

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

Medicine is the restoration of discordant elements; sickness is the discord of the elements infused into the living body. - Leonardo da Vinci

In retrospect, all these exercises in self-gratification seem pure fantasy, what Pascal called 'licking the earth.' - Malcolm Muggeridge

My girlfriend's dog died. So I got her an identical one. She was livid; 'What am I going to do with two dead dogs?' - Gary Delaney

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain