Where Astronauts Hang Out

Save water - drink vodka. - Unknown

Good wine is a necessity of life. - Thomas Jefferson

Wine and children speak the truth. - Greek Proverb

When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb

I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn

Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb

Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown

I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown

Draft Dodger: Someone who avoids beer on tap. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Beer: The method of turning grain into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields

If God forbade drinking, would He have made wine so good? - Cardinal Richelieu

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

Stop trying to make everybody happy - you're not tequila. - Unknown

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. - Benjamin Franklin

We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

Somewhere, behind space and time,
Is wetter water, slimier slime. - Rupert Brooke

To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy. - Frank Sinatra

A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world. - Louis Pasteur

On the keyboard of life always keep one finger on the 'escape' key. - Unknown

In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best

If one glass of wine is good for you, just imagine what a whole bottle could do! - Unknown

If Jesus were living in our culture, he would probably hang out in coffeehouses. - Mark Batterson

Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

New York champagne - that's a phony label. They don't grow raisins in New York. - Archie Bunker

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

Why is it that everybody's suing the tobacco companies and not the alcohol companies? - Donald Trump

My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown

I'm like old wine. They don't bring me out very often - but I'm well preserved. - Rose Kennedy

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

Cyberspace can't compensate for real space. We benefit from chatting to people face to face. - Jonathan Sacks

He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days. - Groucho Marx

I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright

Music was my refuge. I could crawl into the space between the notes and curl my back to loneliness. - Maya Angelou

Age is just a number. It's totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine. - Joan Collins

I am the astronaut of boxing. Joe Louis and Jack Dempsey were just jet pilots. I'm in a world of my own. - Muhammad Ali

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

Be ruthless about your calendar - stick to it, hell or high water but create space for unstructured time as well. - Arjun Arora

We're all trying to keep up in this stupid race. But that won't be much fun when we're floating in space. - John Symeou

I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off. - Pat Paulsen

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

In those days the best painkiller was ice. It wasn't addictive, and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it. - George Burns

Throw your dream into space like a kite, and you do not know what it will bring back: a new life, a new friend, a new love, a new country. - Anais Nin

Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown

Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor