#1 humor site on the 'net

Why Germans Don't Play Scrabble

Frustration with learning German

Why Germans Don't Play Scrabble thanks to Howard Chapman

The longest German word?
Rechtsschutzversicherungsgesellschaften
translation: “Insurance companies providing legal protection”
(recognized by the Guinness Book of World Records as
the longest German word in everyday use)

More seemingly-never-ending German words
Bezirksschornsteinfegermeister
“Head district chimney sweep”

Donaudampfschiffahrtsgesellschaftskapitän
“Danube steamship company captain”

Freundschaftsbezeigungen
“Demonstrations of friendship”

Fussbodenschleifmaschinenverleih
“Floor grinding machine rental”

Kaftfahrzeug-Haftpflichtversicherung
“Motor vehicle liability insurance”

Lebensabschnittpartner
“The person I am with today (partner or lover)”

Rechtsschutzversicherungsgesellschaften
“Insurance companies providing legal protection”

Siebentausendzweihundertvierundfünfzig
The integer 7,254

Unabhaengigkeitserklaerungen
“Independence declarations”


“Some German words are so long that they have perspective.”
Mark Twain
QuotaBills
A riot is the language of the unheard. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

The eyes have one language everywhere. - George Herbert

I am disappointment in you're grammar. - Unknown

Music is well said to be the speech of angels. - Thomas Carlyle

A story is told as much by silence as by speech. - Susan Griffin

Speech was given to man to disguise his thoughts. - Charles de Talleyrand

Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech. - Martin Fraquhar Tupper

Language exerts hidden power, like a moon on the tides. - Rita Mae Brown

Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing. - Robert Benchley

Some German words are so long that they have perspective. - Mark Twain

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. - Lily Tomlin

Germany is a fortress, but it is a fortress without a roof. - Franklin D Roosevelt

You don't have good grammar when you type with your fists. - C.F. Payne

Think like a wise man but communicate in the language of the people. - William Butler Yeats

England is an empire, Germany is a nation, a race, France is a person. - Jules Michelet

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. - Mark Twain

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

If we are a country committed to free speech, then why do we have phone bills? - Steven Wright

45 caliber German Shmowzer - a 38 caliber German Floogle with a telephonic site - Archie Bunker

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker

To God I speak Spanish, to women Italian, to men French, and to my horse - German. - Emperor Charles V

We really have everything in common with America nowadays except, of course, language. - Oscar Wilde

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. - Jimmy Durante

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid. - Soren Kierkegaard

I never made a mistake in grammar but once in my life, and as soon as I done it. I seen it. - Carl Sandburg

Grammar: the difference between Feeling Your Nuts and Feeling You're Nuts. - Unknown

Grammar, which knows how to lord it over kings, and with high hands makes them obey its laws. - Moliere

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

Whatever music sounds like, I am glad to say that it does not sound in the smallest degree like German. - Oscar Wilde

The reason there are so many tree-lined boulevards in Paris is so the German army can march in the shade. - George S Patton

Violence of language leads to violence of action. Angry men seldom fight if their tongues do not lead the fray. - Charles V Roman

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

If the English language made any sense, 'lackadaisical' would have something to do with a shortage of flowers. - Doug Larson

The longest word in the English language is the one following the phrase, "And now a word from our sponsor." - Hal Eaton

Toward the north, from there shone Frederick, the North Star, around whom Germany, Europe, even the world seemed to turn. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Two may talk together under the same roof for many years, yet never really meet; and two others at first speech are old friends. - Mary Catherwood

Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language?
One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap. - Red Skelton

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell

No matter how bad things are, they can always be worse. So what if my stroke left me with a speech impediment? Moses had one, and he did all right. - Kirk Douglas


2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

You May Pet Me

Whatever Time

Cutting Off Board

Car Swarm

We Open

Cloud Computing

Feather Fashion

Nitrate

Proper English

Winter SOS

Canadian Driving Perk

Radio Shack Closes Down

Lunch Apple

Country Office

Pre Tsunami

Olive Weather Forecast

Flood Float

Mud Pie

Double Your Vision

Piano Ring

Extra Safe Lock

Believe In Yourself

Kid Search