Window Washers at a Children's Hospital

Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid

The best medicine is having a good wife. - Kin Hubbard

I love shark week, all kids swim for free. - Josh Stern

Goat Herder: A person who likes to work with kids - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The best thing to spend on your children is your time. - Louise Hart

Whether a person is a male or female, a nurse is a nurse. - Gary Veale

Don't handicap your children by making their lives easy. - Robert H. Heinlein

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

A child seldom needs a good talking to as a good listening to. - Robert Brault

I look in the mirror through the eyes of the child that was me. - Judy Collins

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music. - George Carlin

The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion, our adversaries are insane. - Mark Twain

A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker

This is a sharp medicine, but it is a physician for all diseases and miseries. - Sir Walter Raleigh

No matter how old you are, if a little kid hands you a toy phone, you answer it. - Dave Chappelle

Life loves to be taken by the lapel and told: I'm with you kid, let's go. - Maya Angelou

What can we make of the inexpressible joy of children? It is a kind of gratitude. - Annie Dillard

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

Times are bad. Children no longer obey their parents, and everyone is writing a book. - Cicero

I will continue to freak out my children by knitting in public. It's good for them. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

If you're going to write a book on how to raise children, do it before you have them. - Bob McLaren

If we would listen to our kids, we'd discover that they are largely self-explanatory. - Robert Brault

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman

Daddies don't just love their children every now and then, it's a love without end. - George Strait

Don't worry that your children never listen to you; worry that they are always watching you. - Robert Fulghum

Children are unpredictable. You never know what inconsistency they're going to catch you in next. - Franklin P. Jones

We are the children of many sires, and every drop of blood in us in its turn ... betrays its ancestor. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories. - John Wilmot

A children's story that can only be enjoyed by children is not a good children's story in the slightest. - C S Lewis

The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant - and let the air out of the tires. - Dorothy Parker

The only way we can ever teach a child to say "I'm sorry" is for him to hear it from our lips first. - Kevin Leman

There's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender. - WC Fields

In America you can go on the air and kid the politicians,
and the politicians can go on the air and kid the people. - Groucho Marx

The fundamental defect of fathers, in our competitive society, is that they want their children to be a credit to them. - Bertrand Russell

It is astonishing with how little reading a doctor can practice medicine, but is not astonishing how badly he may do it. - William Osler

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. - George Carlin

Prayer turns ordinary parents into prophets who shape the destinies of their children, grandchildren, and every generation that follows. - Mark Batterson

In a big family the first child is kind of like the first pancake. If it's not perfect, that's okay, there are a lot more coming along. - Antonin Scalia

Rather than pushing children to think like adults, we might do better to remember that they are great learners and to try harder to be more like them. - Seymour Papert