#1 humor site on the 'net

Young At Heart

Time to start feeling young again - enjoy life!

Young At Heart thanks to Barry McCartney

Time is a concept that humans created

QuotaBills
Time wounds all heels. - Groucho Marx

No time like the present. - Mrs Manley

Fame is the thirst of youth. - Lord Byron

Time heals what reason cannot. - Seneca

Time and tide wait for no man. - Geoffrey Chaucer

So wise so young, they say, do never live long. - William Shakespeare

I'm Irish. I think about death all the time. - Jack Nicholson

You become what you think about most of the time. - Earl Nightingale

Of all times in time of war the press should be free. - William Borah

Every hour of lost time is a chance of future misfortune. - Napoleon

We always have time enough, if we will but use it aright. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

A kiss makes the heart young again and wipes out the years. - Rupert Brooke

I'm never sick. Why get sick? It's a waste of time. - Martha Stewart

Come what may, time and the hour runs through the roughest day. - William Shakespeare

The butterfly counts not months but moments, and has time enough. - Rabindranath Tagore

Every man regards his own life as the New Year’s Eve of time. - Jean Paul Richter

Time and words can't be recalled, even if it was only yesterday. - Estonian Proverb

All endings are also beginnings - we just don't know it at the time. - Mitch Albom

A long time ago being crazy meant something. Nowadays everybody's crazy. - Charles Manson

She learned to say things with her eyes that others waste time putting into words. - Corey Ford

The only time a woman wishes she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby. - Mary Marsh

A young man who wishes to remain a sound atheist cannot be too careful of his reading. - C S Lewis

Life is short, and there is too much time wasted bearing grudges, and I like to move on. - Sam Taylor-Johnson

The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron. - Phyllis Diller

If you haven't time to respond to a tug at your pants leg, your schedule is too crowded. - Robert Brault

Obi-Wan Kenobi. Obi-Wan. Now that's a name I have not heard in a long time. A long time. - Obi Wan Kenobi

A habit cannot be tossed out the window. It must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time. - Mark Twain

The object of education is to prepare the young to educate themselves throughout their lives. - Robert M Hutchins

Every time you tear a leaf off a calendar, you present a new place for new ideas and progress. - Charles Kettering

The dementia patient is not giving you a hard time. The dementia patient is having a hard time. - Kerry Kleinbergen

I have a difficult time doing an Irish accent; even now, it kind of fades slowly into Scottish. - Robin Williams

Show me a guy who's afraid to look bad, and I'll show you a guy you can beat every time. - Lou Brock

There is one thing stronger than all the armies in the world, and that is an idea whose time has come. - Victor Hugo

I have a Rubik's Cube for a rearview mirror, because the past is the only time puzzle I can solve. - Jarod Kintz

Love is a piano dropped from a fourth story window, and you were in the wrong place at the wrong time. - Ani DiFranco

There is one kind of robber whom the law does not strike at, and who steals what is most precious to men: time. - Napoleon Bonaparte

When I was young I thought that money was the most important thing in life; now that I am old I know that it is. - Oscar Wilde

Both in thought and in feeling, even though time be real, to realise the unimportance of time is the gate of wisdom. - Bertrand Russell

I think that weddings have probably been crashed since the beginning of time. Cavemen crashed them. You go to meet girls. It makes sense. - Christopher Walken

Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. - Edith Sitwell


Senior Aerobics

Foiled Again

Redneck Beer Hunter

Pair Produce

Potting Pot

Ice Cream Burqa

Dog Soother

Fourk

Women's Outhouse

Crocodile Floor

Hummer Carriage

Antler Switch Plate

Redneck Cotter Pin

Redneck Bulldozer

Your Fly Is Down

Chili Rub

Tire Rotation

Political Promise Hauler

Steering Wheel For Couples

Confined By Walls

Moon Descent

Redneck Selfie Stick

1957 Woolworth Menu

Cops Beating A Black Man in NYC