#1 humor site on the 'net

Young At Heart

Time to start feeling young again - enjoy life!

Young At Heart thanks to Barry McCartney

Time is a concept that humans created

QuotaBills
Time wounds all heels. - Groucho Marx

Time is the life of the soul. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Time is the wisest counselor. - Pericles

Sex is the biggest nothing of all time. - Andy Warhol

time's a strange fellow; more he gives than takes - e e cummings

You can't depend on anyone to be wrong all the time. - American Proverb

A kiss makes the heart young again and wipes out the years. - Rupert Brooke

Time hath often cured the wound which reason failed to heal. - Seneca

There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want. - Bill Watterson

A society of sheep must in time beget a government of wolves. - Bertrand de Jouvenel

Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. - George Bernard Shaw

My father... one of the great immorals, er, immortals, of our time. - WC Fields

A man who's intoxicated all the time doesn't need sympathy. - WC Fields

Spending time with you showed me what I’ve been missing in my life. - Nicholas Sparks

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now. - Chinese Proverb

A long time ago being crazy meant something. Nowadays everybody's crazy. - Charles Manson

The only way to be absolutely safe is to never try anything for the first time. - Magnus Pike

If grass can grow through cement, love can find you at every time in your life. - Cher

Perhaps in time the so-called Dark Ages will be thought of as including our own. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

Leap year gives me extra time to reflect on how unproductive I am with extra time. - Homer Simpson

Most of the time, if you treat people right, you don't have to be afraid of them. - Kathy Kelly

Within you there is a stillness and a sanctuary to which you can retreat at any time. - Hermann Hesse

Your family is depending on you. No better reason to bring all your game all the time. - Grant Cardone

Every time you walk down the street people are screaming, "You're fired!" - Donald Trump

Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you've got to start young. - Fred Astaire

Time neither subtracts nor divides, but adds at such a pace it seems like multiplication. - Bob Talbert

The young man who has not wept is a savage, and the old man who will not laugh is a fool. - George Santayana

A habit cannot be tossed out the window. It must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time. - Mark Twain

Bathtubs are the epitome of luxury. Either you have no money to own one or you have no time to use one. - Akilnathan Logeswaran

When I was young, I observed that nine out of ten things I did were failures. So I did ten times more work. - George Bernard Shaw

If you don't write when you don't have time for it, you won't write when you do have time for it. - Katerina Stoykova Klemer

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

It is books that teach us to refine our pleasures when young, and to recall them with satisfaction when we are old. - Leigh Hunt

If I'm losing balance in a pose, I stretch higher and God reaches down to steady me. It works every time, and not just in yoga. - T. Guillemets

For one swallow does not make a summer, nor does one day. And so too one day, or a short time, does not make a man blessed and happy. - Aristotle

We are all the fools of time and terror: Days Steal on us and steal from us; yet we live, Loathing our life, and dreading still to die. - George Gordon Byron

Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language?
One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap. - Red Skelton

Give your subconscious a chance to work by turning your brain off from time to time. Don't focus on work or solving problems constantly. - Harvey Mackay

The fruits of philosophy are the important thing, not the philosophy itself. When we ask the time, we don't want to know how watches are made. - Georg Christoph Lichtenberg


Peter Cotton Ale

Social Distancing Champ

GPS Directions

Secret Exit

Clippendales

Starborks

Post-Apocalyptical Section

Hide And Sikh

Yoga Pants

Really Good Day

Be Someone

My Time

Algebra Relationship

Mask Shortage

Exit Not Found

Early Shave

Dementia Purse

Quarantine Response

Braided Horse Tail

Government Debt

Statue Tug Of War

Kiosk Hours

Tight Fit

Life Is Beautiful