#1 humor site on the 'net

Aussie Porsche

Down Under, they take their driver safety quite literally

Aussie Porsche thanks to Bryan Harrap

Driving lessons in Australia

QuotaBills
Never insult anyone by accident. - Robert A. Heinlein

Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Safety doesn't happen by accident. - Unknown

Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

Safety is a cheap and effective insurance policy. - Unknown

In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Stardom isn't a profession, it's an accident. - Lauren Bacall

Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines. - David Letterman

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Safety Belt: The one you don't drink before driving home - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Giving never happens by accident. It's always intentional. - Amy Grant

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

The traveler with empty pockets pursues his journey in perfect safety. - Ovid

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion. - Mark Twain

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

When New Zealanders emigrate to Australia, it raises the average IQ of both countries. - Robert Muldoon

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

I think it's an absolute disaster that Australia, the government, allowed kangaroo culling. - Steve Irwin

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia. - Charles M. Schulz

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

If I weren't skateboarding, I'd love to race cars. I like anything that's fast and active. - Ryan Sheckler

Individuality is either the mark of genius or the reverse. Mediocrity finds safety in standardization. - Frederick Crane

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

It's a sad day when you find out that it's not accident or fortune but just yourself that kept things from you. - Lillian Hellman

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

If this humor be the safety of our race, then it is due largely to the infusion into the American people of the Irish brain. - William Howard Taft

Faithfulness is essential to the character of a friend: without this there can be no safety in intimacy with and confidence in him. - Samuel Hopkins

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do. - Pele

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright


Wine Time Finally

Scooter Hearse

Thailand Ferry

Hard Hat Safety

Water Coolant

Spray-On Clothing

Bright Bookshelf

Saddle Surprise

Politicians Be Like

Senior Aerobics

Foiled Again

Redneck Beer Hunter

Pair Produce

Potting Pot

Ice Cream Burqa

Dog Soother

Fourk

Women's Outhouse

Crocodile Floor

Hummer Carriage

Antler Switch Plate

Redneck Cotter Pin

Redneck Bulldozer

Your Fly Is Down