#1 humor site on the 'net

Bad Ass Fire Truck

Big expectations for a hot fire fighting season

Bad Ass Fire Truck thanks to Wayne Nowazek

How to fight even the biggest of forest fires

QuotaBills
Add not fire to fire. - Greek proverb

Love in its essence is spiritual fire. - Emanuel Swedenborg

The best alarm clock is sunshine on chrome. - Unknown

Content is fire and social media is gasoline. - Jay Baer

Morning comes whether you set the alarm or not. - Ursula K. Le Guin

Since the house is on fire let us warm ourselves. - Italian Proverb

We must rekindle the fire of idealism in our society. - Joe Biden

If someone's lying, are their pants really on fire? - Jerry Seinfeld

Words are only painted fire; a book is the fire itself. - Mark Twain

The Irish seem to have more fire about them than the Scots. - Sean Connery

The inner fire is the most important thing mankind possesses. - Edith Sodergran

By the time I have money to burn, my fire will have burnt out. - Unknown

Neither fire nor wind, birth nor death can erase our good deeds. - Buddha

Managers light a fire under people; leaders light a fire in people. - Kathy Austin

The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl. - Dave Barry

Contentment consisteth not in adding more fuel, but in taking away some fire. - Thomas Fuller

Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice. - Ethel Merman

We feel free when we escape - even when it be from the frying pan into the fire. - Eric Hoffer

Success isn't a result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire. - Arnold H Glasow

I took a physical for some life insurance. All they would give me was fire and theft. - Milton Berle

I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place. - Steven Wright

Me and my bed are perfect for each other, but my alarm clock keeps trying to break us up. - Unknown

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water. - Unknown

If crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? - George Carlin

This momentous question, like a fire bell in the night, awakened and filled me with terror. - Thomas Jefferson

Trials function like a fire that burns off every impurity impeding our progress towards holiness. - David Jeremiah

You're an old-timer if you can remember when setting the world on fire was a figure of speech. - Franklin P Jones

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire? - Unknown

Just 'cause there's snow in the basement don't mean there ain't no fire in the roof! - Archie Bunker

I don't have an alarm clock. If someone needs to wake me up, then I have my BlackBerry next to me. - Mark Zuckerberg

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. - Joan Crawford

Years steal fire from the mind as vigor from the limb; and life's enchanted cup but sparkles near the brim. - Lord Byron

The fire of the diamond of true identity is always there; it just needs the Master's crafting to reveal it. - Kenneth G Mills

There was a fire at the main Inland Revenue office in London today, but it was put out before any serious good was done. - Ronnie Corbett

I'm not just retiring from the company, I'm also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron. - Hartman Jule

I have a microwave fireplace in my house... The other night I laid down in front of the fire for the evening in two minutes. - Steven Wright

Doubt thou the stars are fire,
Doubt that the sun doth move,
Doubt truth to be a liar,
But never doubt I love. - William Shakespeare

In case of fire, don't panic. Simply flee the building with the same reckless abandon that occurs each day at quitting time. - Don Delcourt

To have a curable illness and to leave it untreated except for prayer is like sticking your hand in a fire and asking God to remove the flame. - Sandra L. Douglas

Well, yes, I've fired a lot of people. Generally I like other people to fire, because it's always a lousy task. But I have fired many people. - Donald Trump


Who Needs Physics?

Benched Puppies

Water Relief

Shot Glasses

Men in Denim

Chocolate Couch

Ant Attack

Extreme Pressure Cooker

Just Thinking

Nothing Wrong Picture

Lipstick Dog

Hair Strengthener

Whale Photobomb

World Peas

Hide and Seek

Hoodie Onesy

Going Around In Circles

Whiskey Jig

Redneck Mercedes

Hala Fruit

Hydro Water Power

Selfie Shoes

Tons Of Anarchy

Science World