#1 humor site on the 'net

Beethoven Invitation

Who wants to hear a symphony?

Beethoven Invitation thanks to Barbara Kitagawa

Beethoven Invitation thanks to Barbara Kitagawa

Beethoven Invitation thanks to Barbara Kitagawa

Beethoven Invitation thanks to Barbara Kitagawa

Beethoven Invitation thanks to Barbara Kitagawa

QuotaBills
Hear the meaning within the word. - William Shakespeare

He has Van Gogh's ear for music. - Billy Wilder

I hear the tusks are looser in Alabama. - WC Fields

I like Beethoven, especially the poems. - Ringo Starr

Wagner's music is better than it sounds. - Mark Twain

You don't hear me gettin' historical. - Archie Bunker

The quieter you become, the more you can hear. - Ram Dass

Music is spiritual. The music business is not. - Van Morrison

Life is one grand, sweet song, so start the music. - Ronald Reagan

My dad's Irish music was such a huge influence. - Dido Armstrong

My music is best understood by children and animals. - Igor Stravinsky

Writing about music is like dancing about architecture. - Elvis Costello

Of all noises, I think music is the least disagreeable. - Samuel Johnson

Dancing can reveal all the mystery that music conceals. - Charles Baudelaire

The music is all around us. All you have to do is listen. - August Rush

Music is my mistress, and she plays second fiddle to no one. - Duke Ellington

The sweetest music in the world to every person is his own name. - Unknown

If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap? - George Carlin

Nothing is capable of being well set to music that is not nonsense. - Joseph Addison

Music is the divine way to tell beautiful, poetic things to the heart. - Pablo Casals

The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't said. - Peter F Drucker

Music, the greatest good that mortals know and all of heaven we have hear below. - Joseph Addison

When one can hear people moving, one does not so much mind, about one's fears. - Ann Radcliffe

When you don't share your problems, you resent hearing the problems of other people. - Chuck Palahniuk

Great music is as much about the space between the notes as it is about the notes themselves. - Sting

The next time you hear a social media myth, question it. Ask for the proof, and ask out loud. - Dan Zarrella

The value of persistent prayer is not that he will hear us, but that we will finally hear him. - William McGill

And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Words make you think a thought. Music makes you feel a feeling. A song makes you feel a thought. - E Y Harburg

Definition of an Irish fact: That which tells you not what is the case but what you want to hear. - Hugh Kenner

Boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other. - Jack Handey

I think Paul McGuinness and U2 created the Irish music industry. It certainly wasn't there before that. - Van Morrison

The pumpkin hearing, "Let's carve and scoop,"
Ran fast as he could, leaving pumpkin poop. - Shirley Thomas

Melody is the essence of music. I compare a good melodist to a fine racer, and counterpoints to hack post-horses. - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

The only way we can ever teach a child to say "I'm sorry" is for him to hear it from our lips first. - Kevin Leman

If you hear a voice within you say "you cannot paint," then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced. - Vincent Van Gogh

Did you hear about the auto worker who was offered a position as president of a bank but couldn't afford the pay cut? - Unknown

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

I've seen whales calving in the waters off Maui, and I've watched my children being born. But music is the most beautiful thing of all. - Steven Tyler

When I hear of an 'equity' in a case like this, I am reminded of a blind man in a dark room - looking for a black cat - which isn't there. - Charles Bowen


Car Igloo

Hen Pecked

It's Movie Time

In The Dog House

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Diaper Change

Palestinian Security Check

Wurst-Case Scenario

High-Rise Inifinity Pool

Winter Kayaking

Balanced Family Life

Closed Ahead

Forgettable Fishing Trips

I've Got Your Back

Dr Pepper Financing

Wine Therapy

Weakest Part

Cycle Circles

My New Diet

We Is Closed

Cheap Child Support

Ankle Warning

Peanut Sale

Beer Chess