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British Accountant

Catch 22: Hire an accountant or a mathematician?

British Accountant thanks to Bryan Harrap

QuotaBills
Scotland is the Canada of England. - Rainn Wilson

Math research is more like a marathon. - Terence Tao

I speak two languages, English and Body. - Mae West

Ireland is the old sow that eats her farrow. - James Joyce

He was not only a bore; he bored for England. - Malcolm Muggeridge

English Wrestling Champion: A lord of the ring - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Women in London must have learned not to breathe. - Irene Trimble

The English never draw a line without blurring it. - Winston Churchill

Algebra: Undergarment worn by female math teachers - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

He speaks English, Spanish, and he's bilingual too. - Don King

This is the sort of English up with which I will not put. - Winston Churchill

Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown

Math, it's a puzzle to me. I love figuring out puzzles. - Maya Lin

Germlish: Training done using a mixture of English & German - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You only have to survive in England and all is forgiven you. - Alan Bennett

Math is like love - a simple idea but it can get complicated. - R. Drabek

The English winter - ending in July, to recommence in August. - Lord Byron

The English have three vegetables and two of them are cabbage. - Walter Page

You know it's summer in Ireland when the rain gets warmer. - Hal Roach

There'll always be an England, even if it's in Hollywood. - Bob Hope

Dublin University contains the cream of Ireland - rich and thick. - Samuel Beckett

All hockey players are bilingual. They know English and profanity. - Gordie Howe

I was a great student at a great school, Wharton School of Finance. - Donald Trump

Being rich is better than being poor, if only for financial reasons. - Woody Allen

Britain's most useful role is somewhere between bee and dinosaur. - Harold MacMillan

England is an empire, Germany is a nation, a race, France is a person. - Jules Michelet

The English have an extraordinary ability for flying into a great calm. - Alexander Woollcott

When it's three o'clock in New York, it's still 1938 in London. - Bette Midler

I used to go missing a lot... Miss Canada, Miss United Kingdom, Miss World. - George Best

I don't think about financial success as the measurement of my success. - Christie Hefner

Financial ruin from medical bills is almost exclusively an American disease. - Roul Turley

There are ways of singing in English that are not just the same as in French. - Coeur de Pirate

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

Time is money, especially when you're talking to a lawyer or an accountant. - Joe-kster

Under the English legal system you are innocent until you are shown to be Irish. - Ted Whitehead

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker

Humour is practically the only thing about which the English are utterly serious. - Malcolm Muggeridge

The rich take life one financial year at a time. The poor take life one meal at a time. - Mokokoma Mokhonoana

I like to crack the jokes now and again, but it's only because I struggle with math. - Tina Fey

I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining. - Groucho Marx

The funniest line in English is "Get it?" When you say that, everyone chortles. - Garrison Keillor

Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

I want a house with a garden, but slap bang in the centre of London. Next door to a sushi bar. - Michelle Dockery

I had to have some balls to be Irish Catholic in South London. Most of that time I spent fighting. - Pierce Brosnan

The English country gentleman galloping after a fox - the unspeakable in full pursuit of the uneatable. - Oscar Wilde

Although he tortures the English language, he has not yet succeeded in forcing it to reveal its meaning. - J B Morton

In America, the policeman is a working-class hero. In England, the policeman is a working-class traitor. - Martin Amis

Larry Gogan: 'With what town in Britain is Shakespeare associated?'
Contestant: 'Hamlet'. - Larry Gogan

The true identity theft is not financial. It's not in cyberspace. It's spiritual. It's been taken. - Stephen Covey

I alone of English writers have consciously set myself to make music out of what I may call the sound of sense. - Robert Frost

A good financial plan is a road map that shows us exactly how the choices we make today will affect our future. - Alexa Von Tobel

If you find yourself saying, "But I can't speak English...", try adding the word "... yet". - Jane Revell

I welcome him like I welcome cold sores. He's from England, he's angry, and he's got Mad Power Disease. - Paula Abdul

No bum that can't speak poifect English oughta stay in this country - oughta be de-exported the hell outta here! - Archie Bunker

We so often achieve success or financial independence after the chief reason for which we sought it has passed away. - Ellen Glasgow

You can go your whole life and not need math or physics for a minute, but the ability to tell a joke is always handy. - Garrison Keillor

There was a fire at the main Inland Revenue office in London today, but it was put out before any serious good was done. - Ronnie Corbett

The great Gaels of Ireland are the men that God made mad.
For all their wars are merry, and all their songs are sad. - G K Chesterton

Isn't it a very curious thing that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland an' the English brought in the fleas. - Frank McCourt

Understand the key factors in the math behind viral marketing, and use those to figure out what it takes to get viral growth. - David Skok

Englishmen learn Christ's law best in English. Moses heard God's law in his own tongue; so did Christ's apostles. - John Wycliffe

Accountant: 1. A noble insect; 2. A dutiful book balancer whose role within a corporation is to protect it from creative ideas. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan

I think what's going on with gorillas is pretty bad. The fact is that you can buy gorilla meat in London any day you want it. - Adam Ant

It is Ireland's sacred duty to send over, every few years, a playwright to save the English theatre from inarticulate glumness. - Kenneth Tynan

Doctors are saying that each piece of bacon you eat takes 9 minutes off of your life. Based on that math, I should have died in 1732. - Unknown

The English eat all sorts of birds - pigeons, ducks, sparrows - but if you tell them you eat puffin, you might as well come from Mars. - Bjork

Finance functions lose the potential to steer their organizations to success when they defer performance management to other functions. - Jack Alexander

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? - George Carlin

Cricket - a game which the English, not being a spiritual people, have invented in order to give themselves some conception of eternity. - Lord Mancroft


Saying Pun

Redneck Blinds

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Montgomery Ward 1934 Christmas Catalog

Halloween Lamp

Making Music Together

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Triple Bypass Burger

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