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Canadian Speed Bumps

Road potholes - real and imagined

Canadian Speed Bumps thanks to Sandra Montego

QuotaBills
Unsafe at any speed. - Ralph Nader

Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

OK, so what's the speed of dark? - Steven Wright

Goose Bumps: To keep geese from speeding - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Speed is life. Altitude is life insurance. - Unknown

Welcome the coming, speed the parting guest. - Homer

There is more to life than increasing its speed. - Mahatma Gandhi

In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Walter Mondale has all the charisma of a speed bump. - Will Durst

I am not a speed reader.
I am a speed understander. - Isaac Asimov

Know your lines and don't bump into the furniture. - Spencer Tracy

Once you're over the hill, you begin to pick up speed. - Charles M Shulz

The beaten path is the safest, but the traffic's terrible. - Jeff Taylor

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

When you're over the hill, that's when you pick up speed. - Quincy Jones

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

Golden Age: When the kids are too old to need baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

If I weren't skateboarding, I'd love to race cars. I like anything that's fast and active. - Ryan Sheckler

I took a speed reading course and read "War and Peace" in twenty minutes. It involves Russia. - Woody Allen

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

Speed Limit: The velocity one must exceed by approximately 10 MPH on a major highway or risk being run off the road - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

The actual building of roads devoted to motor cars is not for the near future, in spite of many rumors to that effect. - Harper's Weekly

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off. - Woody Allen

I took a course in speed reading. Then I got Reader's Digest on microfilm. By the time I got the machine set up, I was done. - Steven Wright

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

Car Pool: Complicated system of transportation where Mom always winds up going the furthest with the biggest bunch of kids who have had the most sugar - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


Dragon Playground

Redneck Boat Ramp

Jack-A-Lope vs Jack-E-Lope

Urleen

Carry On or Carrion?

Selfie Pilot

Monarch Butterflies - Starting a Monarchy

Air Couch

Europe Road Trip

Thongthing Special

Nighttime Graffiti

Baby Formula

Kid Suction

Redneck Moving Truck

Critter Control

Lost Dog

Nail Chair

Looking For Something?

Yellow Pet

Race Break

Fuse Bypass

Good Boy

British Tea Party

Roadside Assistance