#1 humor site on the 'net

Delicious Grief

Pet pig provides food relief

Delicious Grief thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Bubba's been pigging out over a good friend

QuotaBills
Pork is my friend. - Tom Douglas

Bacon is meat candy. - Unknown

Bacon is duct tape for the kitchen. - Unknown

If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? - George Carlin

I actually get quite sad when I smell bacon. - Jane Velez-Mitchell

In Congress, it's all pork, all the time. - Jim Cooper

You can never put too much pork in your mouth. - Lewis Black

Bacon: the main reason you are not a vegetarian. - Unknown

Ike runs the country, and I turn the pork chops. - Mamie Eisenhower

Life is too short not to order the bacon dessert. - George Takei

You want people to think you live in a pig's eye? - Archie Bunker

Bacon bits are like fairy dust of the food community. - Unknown

There was a sound in their voices which suggested rum. - Robert Louis Sevenson

The food in Yugoslavia is fine if you like pork tartare. - Ed Begley Jr.

Cogito ergo dim sum. (Therefore I think these are pork buns) - Robert Byrne

Whether we wound or are wounded, the blood that flows is red. - Eiichiro Oda

Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight, and bull-strong. - Unknown

Look a pig in its eyes, and understand the truth behind bacon. - Mango Wodzak

Day and night, their frail and crippled ships defy the tempest. - Jorge Luis Borges

Cooking certain dishes, like roast pork, reminds me of my mother. - Maya Angelou

Bacon is going to save the world. I don't know how but it will. - Unknown

Even if the ball was wrapped in bacon, Lassie couldn't find it. - Unknown

If you call ham "Canadian bacon", what do you call bacon? - Michael Kelso

Bacon's not the only thing that's cured by hanging from a string. - Hugh Kingsmill

Never attempt to teach a pig to sing; it wastes your time and annoys the pig. - Robert A. Heinlein

Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. - Ambrose Bierce

I am guilty of asking the Senate for pork and proud of the Senate for giving it to me. - Ted Stevens

Don't ever wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, but the pig will enjoy it. - Cale Yarborough

I blend my green drink every morning. I also fix my son a full-on American breakfast with bacon and toast. - Liz Phair

Nobody can fail to lose weight in the jungle, unless they've got a secret stash of pork pies somewhere. - Colin Baker

Special day! Oh, what have I forgotten now? Now, don't panic. Is it Bacon Day? No, that’s crazy talk! - Homer

In soap, fatty acids made from boiling pork bone fat are used as a hardening agent, but also for giving it a pearl-like effect. - Christien Meindertsma

It's better to swim in the sea below
Than to swing in the air and feed the crow,
Says jolly Ned Teach of Bristol. - Benjamin Franklin

Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor

He who cannot eat horsemeat need not do so. Let him eat pork. But he who cannot eat pork, let him eat horsemeat. It's simply a question of taste. - Nikita Khrushchev

I'm a big State Fair person, and my main goal is to eat as much food as possible, but I tend not to do the foods on a stick. But I like Big Fat Bacon. - Alison McGhee

There have been a few occurrences where people in restaurants have sent me a rasher of bacon, which I am not going to turn my nose up at. I never let them down. - Nick Offerman

Breakfast is my specialty. I admit it's the easiest meal to cook, but I make everything with a twist, like lemon ricotta pancakes or bacon that's baked instead of fried. - Hugh Jackman

The difference between "involvement" and "commitment" is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was "involved" - the pig was "committed". - Unknown

The wolf sniffed beneath the door to be sure this was a human cottage. The scent was undeniable. No pigs, except in bacon form. The wolf thought bacon form was a very sensible way for pigs to behave. - Vivian Vande Velde


Women's Outhouse

Crocodile Floor

Hummer Carriage

Antler Switch Plate

Redneck Cotter Pin

Redneck Bulldozer

Your Fly Is Down

Chili Rub

Tire Rotation

Political Promise Hauler

Steering Wheel For Couples

Confined By Walls

Moon Descent

Redneck Selfie Stick

1957 Woolworth Menu

Cops Beating A Black Man in NYC

The New Norm

Police Car Of The Year

If You're Looking For A Sign

Upside Down Amusement

Bread Zeppelin

Special Second Meal

Perfect Grill

Heat Expands