Detroit Counterfeit Bill

Money is the best cosmetic. - International Proverb

I cried all the way to the bank. - Liberace

Praise doesn't pay the bills. - German Proverb

Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo. - Groucho Marx

Minutes are worth more than money. Spend them wisely. - Thomas P Murphy

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it. - Mark Twain

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed. - George Burns

I can live without money, but I cannot live without love. - Judy Garland

A grandfather carries pictures where his money used to be. - Joe-kster

Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines? - George Carlin

When a habit begins to cost money, it's called a hobby. - Jewish Proverb

Dancing is like bank robbery - it takes split second timing. - Twyla Tharp

Nobody works as hard for his money as the man who marries it. - Kin Hubbard

The best way to ruin a comedy is to throw a lot of money at it. - Jay Leno

I don't mind that I'm fat. You still get the same money. - Marlon Brando

Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back. - Oscar Wilde

By 1946, I knew Detroit was the best hockey city in the Original Six. - Ted Lindsay

The man who never has money to pay his debts has too much of something else. - J.L. Basford

There is a certain Buddhistic calm that comes from having money in the bank. - Tom Robbins

The flood of money that gushes into politics today is a pollution of democracy. - Theodore White

The doctors can cure all sorts of ills, except the shock of doctors' bills. - Unknown

Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need more. (Friend or Money!) - Unknown

If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to. - Dorothy Parker

The first rule is not to lose money. The second rule is not to forget the first rule. - Warren Buffett

Money can't buy you happiness? Well, check this out: I bought myself a happy meal. - Paul F Taylor

Money can't buy you happiness... but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery. - Spike Milligan

Shopping: The fine art of acquiring things you don't need with money you don't have. - Unknown

Half the money I spend on advertising is wasted; the trouble is, I don't know which half. - John Wannamaker

We shouldn't spend money on things we don't need when others don't have the things they do. - Peter Singer

America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight. - Unknown

Success isn't measured by money or power or social rank. Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace. - Mike Ditka

Watching your daughter being collected by her date feels like handing over a million dollar Stradivarius to a gorilla. - Jim Bishop

People confuse amassing money with security, but it is not so. What a pity to confuse real security with making money. - Billy Graham

It would be nice to spend billions on schools and roads, but right now that money is desperately needed for political ads. - Andy Borowitz

How you spend your time is more important than how you spend your money. Money mistakes can be corrected, but time is gone forever. - David B. Norris

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. - Garrison Keillor

I deal with foreign countries. I made a lot of money dealing against China. I've made a lot of money dealing against many other countries. - Donald Trump

I have respect for Senator McCain. I used to like him a lot. I supported him. I raised a lot of money for his campaign against President Obama. - Donald Trump

Commerce: A kind of transaction in which A plunders from B the goods of C, and for compensation B picks the pocket of D of money belonging to E. - Ambrose Bierce

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer