Detroit Counterfeit Bill

God gave me my money. - John D. Rockefeller

Bloods’ not thicker than money. - Groucho Marx

All money is tainted, tain't none of it mine. - Thomas F. McGuire

Insurance is for people who don't have money. - Neil Zukerman

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it. - Mark Twain

Money does not make you happy but it quiets the nerves. - Sean O Casey

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed. - George Burns

After money in the bank, a grudge is the next best thing. - Anthony Trollope

The best way to ruin a comedy is to throw a lot of money at it. - Jay Leno

Never invest your money in anything that eats or needs repairing. - Billy Rose

All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy. - Spike Milligan

What good is money if it can't inspire terror in your fellow man? - Homer Simpson

The way to make money is to buy when blood is running in the streets. - John D. Rockefeller

One dollar for eternal happiness? I'd be happier with the dollar. - Charles Montgomery Burns

There should be no bank too big to fail but no individual too big to jail. - Hillary Clinton

There is no money in poetry, but then there is no poetry in money, either. - Robert Graves

Gentility is what is left over from rich ancestors after the money is gone. - John Ciardi

I love sports. Whenever I can, I always watch the Detroit Tigers on the radio. - Gerald R. Ford

If we are a country committed to free speech, then why do we have phone bills? - Steven Wright

The flood of money that gushes into politics today is a pollution of democracy. - Theodore White

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

If you have a gun you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank you can rob everyone. - Unknown

Do not hire a man who does your work for money, but him who does it for love of it. - Henry David Thoreau

If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to. - Dorothy Parker

The first rule is not to lose money. The second rule is not to forget the first rule. - Warren Buffet

The safest way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket. - Kin Hubbard

It's better to do nothing with your money than something you don't understand. - Suze Orman

To be clever enough to get a great deal of money, one must be stupid enough to want it. - George Bernard Shaw

People don't mind if you have a lot of money if they know you're working for it. - Jay Leno

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

Never work just for money or power. They won't save your soul or help you sleep at night. - Marian Wright Edelman

Tradition is what you resort to when you don't have the time or the money to do it right. - Kurt H Adler

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank. - Woody Allen

It is not the employer who pays wages; he only handles the money. It is the product that pays wages. - Henry Ford

There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. - Sam Kinison

I don't make deals for the money. I've got enough, much more than I'll ever need. I do it to do it. - Donald Trump

Anything which is physically possible can always be made financially possible; money is a bugaboo of small minds. - Robert A. Heinlein

If you owe the bank $100 that's your problem. If you owe the bank $100 million, that's the bank's problem. - J Paul Getty

They invented the three-day bank holiday weekend because you can't lump all the bad weather into just Saturday and Sunday. - Unknown

I've never believed in measuring one's worth by the size of his or her bank account. I prefer to look at distance traveled. - Dan Rather