#1 humor site on the 'net

Did you say her name was Alice?

Following Lewis Carroll down the rabbit hole

Did you say her name was Alice? thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Q: Why is a raven like a writing desk? - the Mad Hatter
A: The higher the fewer, of course! Have another cup of tea! - Stephen King's son Danny

Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland (commonly shortened to Alice in Wonderland) is an 1865 novel written by English author Charles Lutwidge Dodgson under the pseudonym Lewis Carroll. It tells of a girl named Alice who follows a talking, clothed White Rabbit with a pocket watch. Alice falls through a rabbit hole into a curious hall with many locked doors of all sizes - a fantasy world populated by peculiar, anthropomorphic creatures.

QuotaBills
the girl in the treehouse - Jennifer Asbenson

Rabbit: Hare today, mink tomorrow - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Hare Brush: Used to groom a rabbit - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Be brave, little rabbit. Take a chance. - Cherise Sinclair

Dairymaid: A girl who ought to know butter - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If you want the girl next door, go next door. - Joan Crawford

A rich man is never ugly in the eyes of a girl. - French Proverb

A girl with cotton stockings never sees a mouse. - American Proverb

Sometimes a girl's gotta have some chocolate. - Carrie Underwood

A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous. - Coco Chanel

Manicurist: A girl who makes money hand over fist - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Maybe she's a spaghetti girl... straight until wet. - Jodi Lerner

A diamond is the only kind of ice that keeps a girl warm. - Elizabeth Taylor

I want a girl just like the girl that married dear old Dad. - Oedipus Rex

I'd rather have two girls at 21 each than one girl at 42. - WC Fields

I knew a girl so ugly, they use her in prisons to cure sex offenders. - Rodney Dangerfield

Who would ever think that so much can go on in the soul of a young girl? - Anne Frank

It's a good thing I was born a girl, otherwise I'd be a drag queen. - Dolly Parton

I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her. - Notting Hill

Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl. - Stephen Leacock

A girl who thinks that a man will treat her better after marriage than before is a fool. - William C. Hall

What is so real as the cry of a child? A rabbit's cry may be wilder but it has no soul. - Sylvia Plath

Depend on the rabbit's foot if you will, but remember it didn't work for the rabbit. - R.E. Shay

I don't believe in e-mail. I'm an old-fashioned girl. I prefer calling and hanging up. - Sarah Jessica Parker

A little girl is sugar and spice and everything nice - especially when she's taking a nap. - Unknown

I wish I were a little girl again because skinned knees are easier to fix than a broken heart. - Julia Roberts

Many a man has fallen in love with a girl in a light so dim he would not have chosen a suit by it. - Maurice Chevalier

Flops are a part of life's menu and I've never been a girl to miss out on any of the courses. - Rosalind Russell

After all, inside every woman, no matter how grown up she is, there is still a frightened little girl. - Sergei Lukyanenko

When I was born my mother was terribly disappointed. Not that she wanted a girl - she wanted a divorce. - Woody Allen

A wise girl kisses but doesn't love, listens but doesn't believe, and leaves before she is left. - Marilyn Monroe

You can take the girl out of Texas but not the Texas out of the girl and ultimately not the girl out of Texas. - Janine Turner

Dear Diamond,
We all know who is really a girl's best friend.
Yours sincerely,
Chocolate Cake - Unknown

Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves. - Albert Einstein

A girl phoned me the other day and said, "Come on over, nobody's home." I went over. Nobody was home. - Rodney Dangerfield

Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve always enjoyed feeling afraid. I think it is the most delicious feeling there is. - Domingos Monteiro

Doing business without advertising is like winking at a girl in the dark. You know what you are doing, but nobody else does. - Stuart H Britt

From a shy, timid girl I had become a woman of resolute character, who could no longer be frightened by the struggle with troubles. - Anna Dostoevsky

Somebody just back of you while you are fishing is as bad as someone looking over your shoulder while you write a letter to your girl. - Ernest Hemingway

I knew a girl so ugly that she was known as a two-bagger. That's when you put a bag over your head in case the bag over her head comes off. - Rodney Dangerfield


Flying Cathedral Excuse

Day At The Beach

John The Baptist Souvenirs

Amish Prom Limo

Wishy-Washy Church

'Cover Girl' Magazine

One At A Time

Shofar So Good

Temple Car

Closing Time

Wine Glass Lanyard

Awning Truck Advertising

Plugged In

Org Chart - Simplified Version

Extreme Value

Instant Acrophobia

How To Hire Engineers

Business School Basics

Waterwheel Rotisserie

Elephant Bus

Promote Yourself

Time Machine

Redneck Engagement Ring

Forever Clean Toilet