#1 humor site on the 'net

Into Fitness - Part I

Putting only exercise calories into your diet

Into Fitness - Part I thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Fit'ness burger into place

QuotaBills
The greatest wealth is health. - Virgil

Reform: To gain or lose weight - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Laughter is by definition healthy. - Doris Lessing

The dieting wars have got to stop. - Lady Gaga

Happiness is health and a short memory. - Unknown

Americans like fat books and thin women. - Russell Baker

Tears at times have all the weight of speech. - Ovid

Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you. - Joan Rivers

The more you weight the harder you are to kidnap. - Unknown

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat. - Erma Bombeck

Leave off all thin potations and addict thyself to sack. - William Shakespeare

Envy and greed starve on a healthy diet of thanksgiving. - Billy Graham

He who enjoys good health is rich, though he knows it not. - Italian Proverb

Information is pretty thin stuff unless mixed with experience. - Clarence Day

I don't so much mind being old, as I mind being fat and old. - Peter Gabriel

Fond of lawsuits, little wealth; fond of doctors, little health. - Hebrew Proverb

Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise. - Benjamin Franklin

People with healthy self-esteem do not need to create pretend identities. - Unknown

I'm an emotional eater. When I get upset, my diet goes out the window. - Kelly Osbourne

There is nothing more beautiful in this world than a healthy, wise old man. - Lin Yutang

In nothing do men more nearly approach the gods than in giving health to men. - Cicero

A rich rogue is like a fat hog, who never does good 'til as dead as a log. - Benjamin Franklin

Who ever hears of fat men heading a riot, or herding together in turbulent mobs? - Washington Irving

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

Cookie: The standard method for converting sugar, floor, and butter into body fat - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We don't get fat because we overeat; we overeat because we're getting fat. - Gary Taubes

I recently became a Christian Scientist. It was the only health plan I could afford. - Betsy Salkind

Every single diet I ever fell off of was because of potatoes and gravy of some sort. - Dolly Parton

But we have to pass the [health care] bill so that you can find out what's in it. - Nancy Pelosi

My act is sort of improvisational. I have a skeleton in my head, but no fat or skin on it. - Paula Poundstone

I grew up on a steady diet of science fiction, especially apocalyptic and postapocalyptic fiction. - Justin Cronin

The key to a long and healthy marriage is that, honestly, there's nothing worth fighting about. - Jay Leno

They have gun control in Cuba. They have universal health care in Cuba. So why do they want to come here? - Paul Harvey

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

If you maintain a healthy diet, or at least are smart about your food choices, you'll still see the pounds come off. - Misty May-Treanor

Confidence is beautiful, no matter your size, no matter your weight. Be confident in who you are and you'll be beautiful. - Unknown

In Japan, animation is a big part of your media diet. I moved out to Los Angeles at 9, and when I got homesick, I would watch anime. - Hiro Murai

Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles

Health is the finest possession. Contentment is the ultimate wealth. Trustworthy people are the best relatives. Unbinding is the supreme ease. - Buddha

Thank you... fat dude with giant headphones on the subway, for looking like what would've happened if Jabba the Hutt mated with Princess Leia. - Jimmy Fallon


Cutting Edge Delivery

Baby Scan

Redneck Mirror

Skateboard Statue

WipeOut

Turtle Truck

How To Burn Fat

Unplugged

Praying & Preying Mantis

Good Driver

Overpass Passover

Fire Starter

Sinus Remedy - How To Clear Out Your Nostrils

Auto Strap

Never Run a Red Light

Bee Safe

Hummers Only Look Tough

Tactical Texas

Defence Budget Cuts

Welfare State

No Flies On Me

Stick Family Meal

Wet Floor

Lord Of The Watch