#1 humor site on the 'net

Jack-A-Lope vs Jack-E-Lope

Unveiling the mythical Jackalope creature

Jack-A-Lope vs Jack-E-Lope thanks to Richard Olszewski

Jack-A-Lope vs Jack-E-Lope thanks to Richard Olszewski

Jackalope - a mythical animal of North American folklore (a fearsome critter) described as a jackrabbit with antelope horns

QuotaBills
Ghost Writer: Spooksman - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Pumpkin pie fixes everything. - Unknown

I only eat candy on Halloween. - Michael Trevino

Forget Cutie, I'd rather be Pumpkin! - Unknown

Mind sees ghost when frightened and hopeless. - Toba Beta

My only career goal is to be a Halloween icon. - Nuno Roque

Now I know what a ghost is. Unfinished business. - Salman Rushdie

Halloween pumpkins aglow.
Come see the show. - Unknown

Halloween is an opportunity to be really creative. - Judy Gold

It's easier to dismiss ghosts in the daylight. - Patricia Briggs

Costumes and scenery alone will not attract audiences. - Anna Held

At night, here in the library, the ghosts have voices. - Alberto Manguel

The only way you can become a legend is in your coffin. - Bette Davis

The muses are ghosts, and sometimes they come uninvited. - Stephen King

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

Only the knife knows what goes on in the heart of a pumpkin. - Simone Schwarz-Bart

The pumpkin is always oranger on the other side of the patch. - Unknown

Studio 54 made Halloween in Hollywood look like a PTA meeting. - Lorna Luft

A house with old furniture has no need of ghosts to be haunted. - Hope Mirrlees

Nothing on Earth so beautiful as the final haul on Halloween night. - Steve Almond

Take care of your costume and your confidence will take care of itself. - Amit Kalantri

I'm not a real Halloween kind of guy, because Halloween is every day. - Al Jourgensen

When black cats prowl and pumpkins gleam,
May luck be yours on Halloween. - Unknown

This poor pumpkin gave in to rot,
and all that's left is pumpkin snot. - Shirley Thomas

I love you more than pumpkin spice latte but please don't make me prove it! - Unknown

I went to a haunted house, looked under the kitchen table, and found spirit gum. - Steven Wright

In one aspect, yes, I believe in ghosts, but we create them. We haunt ourselves. - Laurie H. Anderson

The people you love become ghosts inside of you, and like this you keep them alive. - Rob Montgomery

I get more distracted by hair or a really bad wig than I do costumes any day of the week. - Colleen Atwood

I love to put on a wig, a costume, inhabit a different world and be called something different. - Susan Egan

Seems like Americans just want it to be Halloween all year. The holiday just keeps getting more popular. - Amity Shlaes

We used to go around tipping outhouses over, or turning over corn shocks on Halloween. Anything to be mean. - Loretta Lynn

The pumpkin hearing, "Let's carve and scoop,"
Ran fast as he could, leaving pumpkin poop. - Shirley Thomas

As a kid, you looked forward to Charlie Brown during Halloween and you looked forward to Monday Night Football. - Nick Ferguson

The farther we've gotten from the magic and mystery of our past, the more we've come to need Halloween. - Paula Guran

The house smelled musty and damp, and a little sweet, as if it were haunted by the ghosts of long-dead cookies. - Neil Gaiman

If human beings had genuine courage, they'd wear their costumes every day of the year, not just on Halloween. - Douglas Coupland

It is good for a man to invite his ghosts into his warm interior, out of the wild night, into the firelight, out of the howling dark. - A.S. Byatt

Halloween is one of my favorite days of the year. I have a strict rule: I don't work on Halloween and I won't travel on Halloween. - Simon Sinek

Instead of doing cinnamon, nutmeg, and all those baking spices I'll have one spice that's for sweets, and that's pumpkin pie spice. - Sandra Lee


Canadian Drive-Thru

Work At Home Mom

German Car Parkade

Dog Face or Dog Butt?

Trunk Minions

Despicable Watermelon

New Parking Spot For Women

Popcorn Cremation

Time Is Free

Fishing Trip in New Zealand

Happy 4th of July

Click Click Imaging Specialists

Awkward

Soldier Salute

You Turn

Australia 101 For Tourists

Horse Wood Sculpture

Changing Priorities Ahead

Fishing With Moses

Expired Marriage

Goose Walkers

Minion HotHead

Christopher Walken

Greek Financial Path