Keep The Han in Hanukkah

Off-the-docks Jews (Orthodox Jews) - Archie Bunker

Christmas comes, but once a year is enough. - American Proverb

What we need is Star Peace and not Star Wars. - Mikhail Gorbachev

All men are Jews, except they don't know it. - Bernard Malamud

I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd

I only have two passions: space exploration and hip hop. - Buzz Aldrin

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

My husband said he needed more space. So I locked him outside. - Roseanne Barr

I don't think anyone has been slandered more than the Jews. - Fidel Castro

He had them as spellbound as a room full of Ewoks listening to C-3PO. - Cory Doctorow

Humor does not diminish the pain - it makes the space around it get bigger. - Allen Klein

Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! - Homer Simpson

Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard

Vanity can create a very cruel space for you if you don't know how to manage it. - Lady Gaga

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

Anakin, you're breaking my heart! And you're going down a path I cannot follow! - Padme

True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker

Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle

Coming from Canada, being a writer and Jewish as well, I have impeccable paranoia credentials. - Mordecai Richler

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

I have drawn inspiration from the Marine Corps, the Jewish struggle in Palestine and Israel, and the Irish. - Leon Uris

The larger office, the corner space, the extra window are the teddy bears and tricycles of adult office life. - Willard Gaylin

Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

This is the real enemy, the invader from the East, the Druze, the ruffian, the oriental parasite; in a word: the Jew. - George Bernard Shaw

We're all trying to keep up in this stupid race. But that won't be much fun when we're floating in space. - John Symeou

Hello. I don't believe we have been introduced. R2-D2? A pleasure to meet you. I am C-3PO, Human-Cyborg Relations. - C-3PO

Every year during their High Holy Days, the Jewish community reminds us all of our need for repentance and forgiveness. - Billy Graham

Oh my. Space travel sounds rather perilous. I can assure you they will never get me on one of those dreadful Star Ships. - C-3PO

In most homes, the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. - Evan Esar

Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump

The real lover is the man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space. - Marilyn Monroe

As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind - every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder. - John Glenn

The space in a needle's eye is sufficient for two friends, but the whole world is scarcely big enough to hold two enemies. - Solomon Ibn Gabirol

You live in the image you have of the world. Every one of us lives in a different world, with different space and different time. - Alejandro Jodorowsky

When my wife says she'll be ready in 5 minutes, I know I have just enough time to fly to space and write a poem on the moon before we go. - Mike Vanatta

Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. - Viktor Frankl