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I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King

Has Beans: Used coffee grounds - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A morning without coffee is like sleep. - Unknown

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

How I feel when there is no coffee? DEPRESSO - Unknown

Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown

Coffee,chocolate, men. The richer the better! - Unknown

Should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee? - Albert Camus

I have measured out my life with coffee spoons. - T S Eliot

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

I only drink coffee grown in high altitude rain forests. - Rob Dyrdek

Depresso: The feeling you get when you run out of coffee - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I think if I were a woman I'd wear coffee as a perfume. - John Van Druten

Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank. - Alphonse Allais

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Wilhelm II

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I

Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee. - Stephanie Piro

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time. - Steven Wright

Without my morning coffee, I'm just like a dried-up piece of goat. - J.S. Bach

What would life be without coffee? But then, what is it even with coffee? - King Louis XV

If there's no coffee, I'm not getting up. Make Groundhog Day just better. - ethicalbean

Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after. - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

The less Holy Spirit we have, the more cake and coffee we need to keep the church going. - Reinhard Bonnke

A half finished shawl left on the coffee table isn't a mess; it's an object of art. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

If this is coffee, please bring me some tea. But if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. - Abraham Lincoln

Jitterbug: 1. A Scotchman in front of a pay toilet; 2. Insect that's had too much coffee. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You haven't had enough coffee until you can thread a sewing machine while it's running. - Unknown

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

Don't talk to me until I've had my coffee, and then after that still don't talk to me. - Unknown

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time they'd ever given blood. - Phyllis Diller

If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster


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