Long Liquor Store

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King

Has Beans: Used coffee grounds - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks? - Steven Wright

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

When coffee dreams, it dreams of chocolate. - Unknown

I like my men like I like my coffee. Silent. - Anna Kendrick

How I feel when there is no coffee? DEPRESSO - Unknown

Coffee,chocolate, men. The richer the better! - Unknown

Should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee? - Albert Camus

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

Leanardo De Cappuccino: Founder, coffee shop chain - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson

I think if I were a woman I'd wear coffee as a perfume. - John Van Druten

Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank. - Alphonse Allais

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Wilhelm II

A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems. - Paul Erdos

Coffee and chocolate - the inventor of mocha should be sainted. - Cherise Sinclair

A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I

Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee. - Stephanie Piro

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time. - Steven Wright

What would life be without coffee? But then, what is it even with coffee? - King Louis XV

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

It's amazing how the world begins to change through the eyes of a cup of coffee. - Donna A Favors

Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The less Holy Spirit we have, the more cake and coffee we need to keep the church going. - Reinhard Bonnke

I just want a hot cup of coffee, black, and I don't want to hear about your troubles. - Charles Bukowski

If this is coffee, please bring me some tea. But if this is tea, please bring me some coffee. - Abraham Lincoln

Jitterbug: 1. A Scotchman in front of a pay toilet; 2. Insect that's had too much coffee. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You haven't had enough coffee until you can thread a sewing machine while it's running. - Unknown

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time they'd ever given blood. - Phyllis Diller