Massage Therapist

Maternity Hospital: An heirport - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer

The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine. - Lord Byron

Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito

Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher

Dear Math: I'm not a therapist. Solve your own problems. - Unknown

A physical therapist does some unbelievable stretching with me. - Brian O'Driscoll

Medicine is a science of uncertainty and an art of probability. - William Osler

Document: Repeating what your Doctor told you in your own words - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Chiropractor: A Doctor who works his fingers to the bone - yours - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Operation: A surgical job taking minutes to do and years to describe - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Save one life, you're a hero. Save 100 lives, you're a nurse. - Unknown

The last mosquito that bit me had to check into the Betty Ford clinic. - Joanna Lumley

The good-news stories in medicine are early detection, early intervention. - Thomas R Insel

When it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain. - Graham Norton

A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker

Faith and knowledge lean largely upon each other in the practice of medicine. - Peter Mere Latham

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin

People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca

We go by the major vote, and if the majority are insane, the sane must go to the hospital. - Horace Mann

The yoga mat is a good place to turn when talk therapy and antidepressants aren't enough. - Amy Weintraub

I have had my television aerials removed. It is the moral equivalent of a prostate operation. - Malcolm Muggeridge

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. - Orson Welles

Some of these people need ten years of therapy - ten sentences of mine do not equal ten years of therapy. - Oscar Wilde

If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov

The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer

Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned. - George Balanchine

In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer

There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - Orison Swett Marden

Despite all our toil and progress, the art of medicine still falls somewhere between trout casting and spook writing. - Ben Hecht

The public blabbers about preventive medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure. - Martin H. Fischer

Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. - George Carlin

A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller

Nurse: 1. A woman whose business is to make sickness a pleasure; 2. A young women who holds your wrist and then expects your pulse to be normal. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer