QuotaBillsWine is bottled poetry. - Robert Louis Stevenson
Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw
Good wine is a necessity of life. - Thomas Jefferson
When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb
Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash
Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen
Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb
We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown
Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson
I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown
Good friends, like wine, get better with age. - Unknown
Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman
As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
I should never have switched from Scotch to martinis. - Humphrey Bogart
Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting? - WC Fields
Some call it Cocktail Hour. To me, it's a support group. - Unknown
Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown
I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields
Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson
Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits
You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West
Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II
We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano
A raise is like a martini: it elevates the spirit, but only temporarily. - Dan Seligman
I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown
To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson
Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving. - Albert Einstein
Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine. - Casablanca
If one glass of wine is good for you, just imagine what a whole bottle could do! - Unknown
A gorilla with a cellphone riding a bicycle is bound to generate some clever captions. - Steve Breen
You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx
I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch. - George Burns
My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown
The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron. - Phyllis Diller
Wine makes a man more pleased with himself. I do not say it makes him more pleasing to others. - Samuel Johnson
Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana
I took lessons in bicycle riding. But I could only afford half of them. Now I can ride a unicycle. - Steven Wright
Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. - Carl Jung
I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright
Ninety percent I'll spend on good times, women and Irish Whiskey. The other ten percent I'll probably waste. - Tug McGraw
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin
I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off. - Pat Paulsen
The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker
You pretty much can't get away from bacon or whiskey in the South. Put a doughnut in it and you'd be good to go. - Hillary Scott
Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry
If you like the outdoors, Colorado is a big adventure playground for adults: it's great for skiing, cycling, climbing, and hiking. - Tyler Hamilton
Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown
NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown
Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor
If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster