QuotaBillsIn wine, there is truth. - Pliny the Elder
Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee
Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw
Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown
Last week I forgot how to ride a bicycle. - Steven Wright
When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller
Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb
I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown
Good friends, like wine, get better with age. - Unknown
Wine is the flower in the buttonhole of life. - Werumeus Buning
Wine is the most civilized thing in the world. - Ernest Hemingway
Talking to you is like casting pearls into wine. - Archie Bunker
Music is the wine that fills the cup of silence. - Robert Fripp
I should never have switched from Scotch to martinis. - Humphrey Bogart
A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - Gloria Steinem
Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting? - WC Fields
Liquor talks mighty loud when it gets loose from the jug. - Joel C Harris
Some call it Cocktail Hour. To me, it's a support group. - Unknown
Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Wilhelm II
Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown
One martini is all right, two is too many, three is not enough. - James Thurber
A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I
Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson
Whenever I see an adult on a bicycle I have hope for the human race. - H G Wells
Too much of anything is bad. Too much of good whisky is barely enough. - Mark Twain
Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - Pope John XXIII
To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson
What do you call a cyclist who doesn't wear a helmet? An organ donor. - David Perry
In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best
In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin
Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold. - Jerry Vale
A gorilla with a cellphone riding a bicycle is bound to generate some clever captions. - Steve Breen
Life is like riding a bicycle. You don't fall off unless you plan to stop pedaling. - Claude Pepper
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke
They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray
Age is just a number. It's totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine. - Joan Collins
When the clergyman's daughter
Drinks nothing but water
She's certain to finish on gin. - Rudyard Kipling
Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the muscles that can. - Terry Pratchett
Milk is the drink of babies, tea the drink of women, water the drink of beasts, and wine is the drink of the gods. - John S Blackie
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin
I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off. - Pat Paulsen
You pretty much can't get away from bacon or whiskey in the South. Put a doughnut in it and you'd be good to go. - Hillary Scott
I have made an important discovery - that alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, produces all the effects of intoxication. - Oscar Wilde
A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke
A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron
Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown
When I have an idea, I turn down the flame, as if it were a little alcohol stove, as low as it will go. Then it explodes and that is my idea. - Ernest Hemingway
Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor
If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster