#1 humor site on the 'net

Punctuation Is Importanter

English grammar lesson for British protesters

Punctuation Is Importanter thanks to Shawn Kennedy

Sign of opposite appeal: No, I want more!

QuotaBills
Humor is a universal language. - Joel Goodman

Is there another word for synonym? - George Carlin

Speech is silver; silence is golden. - Thomas Carlyle

I believe in God, only I spell it Nature. - Frank Lloyd Wright

Speech is of time; silence is of eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

I am the Roman Emperor and am above grammar. - Emperor Sigismund

Good sayings are like pearls strung together. - Chinese Proverb

English Wrestling Champion: A lord of the ring - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I will not down to posterity talking bad grammar. - Benjamin Disraeli

Speech was given to man to disguise his thoughts. - Charles de Talleyrand

One must be a wise reader to quote wisely and well. - Amos Bronson Alcott

Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech. - Martin Fraquhar Tupper

The surest way to make a monkey out of a man is to quote him. - Robert Benchley

The English have three vegetables and two of them are cabbage. - Walter Page

There is no language like the Irish for soothing and quieting. - John Millington Synge

You're not a star until they can spell your name in Karachi. - Humphrey Bogart

We have always found the Irish a bit odd. They refuse to be English. - Winston Churchill

Wisdom is knowing when to speak your mind and when to mind your speech. - Evangel

When I quote others I do so in order to express my own ideas more clearly. - Michel de Montaigne

I don't care what you say about me. Just be sure to spell my name wrong. - Barbra Streisand

A bore is one who has the power of speech but not the capacity for conversation. - Benjamin Desraeli

Actions, looks, words and steps form the alphabet by which you may spell character. - Johann Kasper Lavater

Language: The blood of the soul into which thoughts run, and out of which they grow - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Nostalgia is like a grammar lesson: you find the present tense, but the past perfect. - Owens L. Pomeroy

Great literature is simply language charged with meaning to the utmost possible degree. - Ezra Pound

At no time is freedom of speech more precious than when a man hits his thumb with a hammer. - Marshall Lumsden

The first man to use abusive language instead of his fists was the founder of civilization. - Sigmund Freud

Language is our meeting place, the sea we live in... it is the common ground of our humanity. - Toby Wolfe

Grammar, which knows how to lord it over kings, and with high hands makes them obey its laws. - Moliere

Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to. - Unknown

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

Although he tortures the English language, he has not yet succeeded in forcing it to reveal its meaning. - J B Morton

Language, identity, place, home: these are all of a piece - just different elements of belonging and not-belonging. - Jhumpa Lahiri

No bum that can't speak poifect English oughta stay in this country - oughta be de-exported the hell outta here! - Archie Bunker

Music expresses feeling and thought, without language; it was below and before speech, and it is above and beyond all words. - Robert G Ingersoll

Englishmen learn Christ's law best in English. Moses heard God's law in his own tongue; so did Christ's apostles. - John Wycliffe

It is Ireland's sacred duty to send over, every few years, a playwright to save the English theatre from inarticulate glumness. - Kenneth Tynan

If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart. - Nelson Mandela

Music is a language that doesn't speak in particular words. It speaks in emotions, and if it's in the bones, it's in the bones. - Keith Richards

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell


Cat Dugout

Open Drive Through

Secret Revealed

Tired Flagpole

Bent Car Sculpture

Cow Jacket

Thanks For Noticing

Overflow Truck Garden

Beach Sign Training

Encouraging Seal

GMC Pool

Nature Calls

You're Home Early

New Nail Gun

Long Noodles

EMS Upgrade

No Pot Of Gold

Graduation Swag

Monkeypox

Pre-Dinner Photography

Curses, Foiled Again

Ant Virus

Sidewalk Malt Melt

Bird's Eye View