Redneck Speed Bump

Unsafe at any speed. - Ralph Nader

Fjord: Norwegian car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Afford: Popular type of car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Speed is life. Altitude is life insurance. - Unknown

A Chicken in Every Pot and a Car in Every Garage - Herbert Hoover

In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy. - Von Clausewitz

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. - Ludwig Borne

Once you're over the hill, you begin to pick up speed. - Charles M Shulz

What a strange illusion to suppose that beauty is goodness. - Leo Tolstoy

Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. - Steven Wright

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

When you're over the hill, that's when you pick up speed. - Quincy Jones

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

Never say never because limits, like fears, are often just an illusion. - Michael Jordan

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. - George Bernard Shaw

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge. - Daniel J. Boorstin

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure. - Scott Adams

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

The illusion that the times that were are better than those that are has probably pervaded all ages. - Horace Greeley

When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk

I took a speed reading course and read "War and Peace" in twenty minutes. It involves Russia. - Woody Allen

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

The elderly don't drive that badly; they're just the only ones with time to do the speed limit. - Jason Love

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

Speed Limit: The velocity one must exceed by approximately 10 MPH on a major highway or risk being run off the road - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Do you think you're safe in a car with your seatbelt on? Dream on. My friend thought so. Now she's pregnant. - Anke Engelke

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 2,000 MPG. - Bill Gates

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett

Living in the past is a dull and lonely business; looking back strains the neck muscles, causes you to bump into people not going your way. - Edna Ferber

Love easily confuses us because it is always in flux between illusion and substance, between memory and wish, between contentment and need. - Tom Robbins

Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Car Pool: Complicated system of transportation where Mom always winds up going the furthest with the biggest bunch of kids who have had the most sugar - Daffynitions joe-ks.com