Redneck Water Fountain

Save water - drink vodka. - Unknown

Johnny Cash: A dime for the pay toilet - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Friendship is a plant we must often water. - German Proverb

Bread and water can so easily be toast and tea. - Janet Clarkson

Muddy water is best cleared by leaving it alone. - Alan Watts

Like water, we are truest to our nature in repose. - Cyril Connolly

He was so good he would pour rose water on a toad. - Douglas Jerrold

People run from rain but sit in bathtubs full of water. - Charles Bukowski

You can't cross the sea merely by staring at the water. - Rabindranath Tagore

Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water! - Groucho Marx

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

I moved to Florida because you don't have to shovel water. - James Randi

The cure for anything is salt water - sweat, tears or the sea. - Isak Dinesen

I ran a 100-mile marathon, and I was powered by coconut water. - Jesse Itzler

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. - English Proverb

Don't think there are no crocodiles because the water is calm. - Malayan Proverb

Love and work are to people, what water and sunshine are to plants. - Jonathan Haidt

You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it. - WC Fields

Gardening requires lots of water, most of it in the form of perspiration. - Lou Erickson

Cash Flow: The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I finally found out how priests get holy water. They boil the hell out of it. - Joan Rivers

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments. - Chris Rock

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

When I was younger I used to lock myself in the bathroom and read in the dry tub. - Karen Russell

Warm Water Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You can lead a herring to water, but you have to walk really fast or he'll die. - Rose

There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom. - Kiefer Sutherland

I'd rather be able to face myself in the bathroom mirror than be rich and famous. - Ani DiFranco

Start writing, no matter what. The water does not flow until the faucet is turned on. - Louis L'Amour

Puddle: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

The dignity of movement of an iceberg is due to only one ninth of it being above water. - Ernest Hemingway

Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. - Richard M Nixon

A wise man adapts himself to circumstances, as water shapes itself to the vessel that contains it. - Chinese Proverb

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. - George Carlin

Be like a duck, paddling and working very hard inside the water, but what everyone sees is a smiling and calm face. - Manoj Arora

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

Love would never be a promise of a rose garden unless it is showered with light of faith, water of sincerity and air of passion. - Unknown

Advice from a tree:
- Stand tall and proud
- Go out on a limb
- Remember your roots
- Drink plenty of water
- Enjoy the view - Unknown