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Shopping Wait-er

Shopping hours are never long enough for Wilbur's wife

Shopping Wait-er thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
My wife gives good headache. - Rodney Dangerfield

The mistakes are all waiting to be made. - Savielly Grigorievitch Tartakower

Malaria: Several shopping centers close to each other - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same. - Oscar Wilde

I give unto my wife my second best bed, with the furniture. - William Shakespeare

My wife made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday. - Rodney Dangerfield

The antiques my wife buys at auctions are keeping me baroque. - Peter De Vries

I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back. - Henny Youngman

My wife is a sex object. Every time I ask for sex, she objects. - Les Dawson

In my house I'm the boss. My wife is just the decision maker. - Woody Allen

A good thing sells itself; a bad thing advertises itself for sale. - African Saying

When your wife asks what's on TV, dust is not the right answer. - Unknown

My wife and I are getting remarried. Our divorce didn't work out. - Rodney Dangerfield

Whoever said money can't buy happiness didn't know where to shop. - Gertrude Stein

The trick is to make sure you don't die waiting for prosperity to come. - Lee Iacocca

When a man retires his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income. - Chi Chi Rodriguez

When my wife asked me to start a garden the first thing I dug up was an excuse. - Henny Youngman

I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her. - Red Skelton

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. - Sacha Guitry

I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming. - Jimmy Carter

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

Shopping: The fine art of acquiring things you don't need with money you don't have. - Unknown

At the door of life, by the gate of breath, there are worse things waiting for men than death. - A.C. Swinburne The Triumph Of Time

My wife hasn't had a birthday in 4 years. She was born in the year of our Lord-only-knows. - Unknown

I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with 28 years ago. - Will Rogers

I went to a garage sale. "How much for the garage?" "It's not for sale." - Steven Wright

A good wife is one who can mow the lawn in the summer and put up the storm windows in the winter. - WC Fields

Plant your garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. - Jose L Borges

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "Cigarettes contain fat." - Dave Barry

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife. - Rodney Dangerfield

The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull

Too often, sales reps simply regurgitate their presentations and expect to land the sale. It doesn't work. - Harvey Mackay

I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife. - Ilie Nastase

Waiting around to be perfect never amounts to anything. Don't be a waiter or you'll be serving other people. - Ian Desabrais

People shop and learn in a whole new way compared to just a few years ago, so marketers need to adapt or risk extinction. - Brian Halligan

I like to do things for my wife on Valentine's Day. I open the door for her when she puts laundry in the washing machine. - Milton Berle

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry

When one may pay out over two million dollars to presidential and Congressional campaigns, the U.S. government is virtually up for sale. - John W. Gardner

When I was a young man I vowed never to marry until I found the ideal woman. Well, I found her but, alas, she was waiting for the ideal man. - Alain

Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list. - Yakov Smirnoff


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