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Smirnoff Women

We don't serve women here - you have to bring your own

Smirnoff Women thanks to Frank Howard

Smirnoff Women thanks to Frank Howard

QuotaBills
When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb

Successful Woman: One who finds such a man - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown

Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown

Ideal Wife: Any woman who has an ideal husband - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Music is the wine that fills the cup of silence. - Robert Fripp

Waitress: A woman who thinks money grows on trays - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

As Unto The Bow The Cord Is, So Unto The Man Is Woman - Longfellow

Bladder: The human apparatus that pays the tax on beer - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it. - George Carlin

I like men who have a future and women who have a past. - Oscar Wilde

Women like silent men. They think they're listening. - Marcel Achard

Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known. - Walt Disney

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot. - Groucho Marx

A woman's best protection is a little money of her own. - Clare B Luce

Behind every successful man is a woman. Behind her is his wife. - Groucho Marx

Women and foxes, being weak, are distinguished by superior tact. - Ambrose Bierce

A meal without cheese is like a beautiful woman who lacks an eye. - Jean A Brillat-Savarin

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. - Benjamin Franklin

Frump: A woman who looks her age and doesn't try to overlook it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Market: 1. Three women and a goose; 2. What teachers do to homework. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Most women are afraid of clowns, but somehow end up still dating one. - Unknown

Love is what happens to men and women who don’t know each other. - W Somerset Maugham

I am a woman meant for a man, but I never found a man who could compete. - Bette Davis

That woman speaks eighteen languages and can't say no in any of them. - Dorothy Parker

A woman knows the face of the man she loves as a sailor knows the open sea. - Honore de Balzac

If women can be railroad workers in Russia, why can't they fly in space? - Valentina Tereshkova

Bargain Sale: A place where a woman can ruin one dress while she buys another - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The woman who can create her own job is the one who will win fame and fortune. - Amelia Earhart

A woman's best love letters are always written to the man she is betraying. - Lawrence Durrell

Menopause is our chance to say, "I am woman - open a freaking window." - Unknown

Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible. - Margaret Mead

New York champagne - that's a phony label. They don't grow raisins in New York. - Archie Bunker

Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed. - Oscar Wilde

If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days. - Robin Williams

A man has to be Joe McCarthy to be called ruthless. All a woman has to do is put you on hold. - Marlo Thomas

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd,
Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorned. - William Congreve

After all, inside every woman, no matter how grown up she is, there is still a frightened little girl. - Sergei Lukyanenko

One should never trust a woman who tells her real age; a woman who would tell one would tell one anything. - Oscar Wilde

I see when men love women. They give them but a little of their lives. But women when they love give everything. - Oscar Wilde

Women are the most powerful magnet in the universe. And all men are cheap metal. And we all know where north is. - Larry Miller

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. - Sam Levenson

If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him... is he still wrong? - George Carlin

I think being a woman is like being Irish. Everyone says you're important and nice, but you take second place all the same. - Iris Murdoch

I'm always worried when a woman sees me naked for the first time. That she's just gonna scream and run out of the park. - Gary Delaney

Every woman's dream is that a man will take her in his arms, throw her into bed... and clean the whole house while she sleeps. - Unknown

With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to "the best woman a man ever had." The waiter joined me. - Rodney Dangerfield

Nurse: 1. A woman whose business is to make sickness a pleasure; 2. A young women who holds your wrist and then expects your pulse to be normal. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


All We Have To Do Is Stand Up

Vacuum Extender

BrownEes

Chinese Puzzle Car

Always Give 100% At Work

Ancient Politician

My Toaster Is Broken

Shining Stars

Tunnel Face

The Bugs Are Bad This Year

Dog Spa

Ostrich Imprint

Local Crabs

World's First Hard Hat

Bird Melons

Bag Hang-Up

LippoPotumus

Haircut For Staff Meetings

Wolf Mode

Undertaker Bike

Throwaway Sport Paper

Pacman Skeleton

Vatican City's New Breakfast Special

Flying Cathedral Excuse