QuotaBillsWhen the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb
Successful Woman: One who finds such a man - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown
Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown
Ideal Wife: Any woman who has an ideal husband - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Music is the wine that fills the cup of silence. - Robert Fripp
Waitress: A woman who thinks money grows on trays - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
As Unto The Bow The Cord Is, So Unto The Man Is Woman - Longfellow
Bladder: The human apparatus that pays the tax on beer - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it. - George Carlin
I like men who have a future and women who have a past. - Oscar Wilde
Women like silent men. They think they're listening. - Marcel Achard
Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson
I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known. - Walt Disney
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot. - Groucho Marx
A woman's best protection is a little money of her own. - Clare B Luce
Behind every successful man is a woman. Behind her is his wife. - Groucho Marx
Women and foxes, being weak, are distinguished by superior tact. - Ambrose Bierce
A meal without cheese is like a beautiful woman who lacks an eye. - Jean A Brillat-Savarin
Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. - Benjamin Franklin
Frump: A woman who looks her age and doesn't try to overlook it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Market: 1. Three women and a goose; 2. What teachers do to homework. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Most women are afraid of clowns, but somehow end up still dating one. - Unknown
Love is what happens to men and women who don’t know each other. - W Somerset Maugham
I am a woman meant for a man, but I never found a man who could compete. - Bette Davis
That woman speaks eighteen languages and can't say no in any of them. - Dorothy Parker
A woman knows the face of the man she loves as a sailor knows the open sea. - Honore de Balzac
If women can be railroad workers in Russia, why can't they fly in space? - Valentina Tereshkova
Bargain Sale: A place where a woman can ruin one dress while she buys another - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The woman who can create her own job is the one who will win fame and fortune. - Amelia Earhart
A woman's best love letters are always written to the man she is betraying. - Lawrence Durrell
Menopause is our chance to say, "I am woman - open a freaking window." - Unknown
Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible. - Margaret Mead
New York champagne - that's a phony label. They don't grow raisins in New York. - Archie Bunker
Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed. - Oscar Wilde
If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days. - Robin Williams
A man has to be Joe McCarthy to be called ruthless. All a woman has to do is put you on hold. - Marlo Thomas
An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown
Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd,
Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorned. - William Congreve
After all, inside every woman, no matter how grown up she is, there is still a frightened little girl. - Sergei Lukyanenko
One should never trust a woman who tells her real age; a woman who would tell one would tell one anything. - Oscar Wilde
I see when men love women. They give them but a little of their lives. But women when they love give everything. - Oscar Wilde
Women are the most powerful magnet in the universe. And all men are cheap metal. And we all know where north is. - Larry Miller
Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. - Sam Levenson
If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him... is he still wrong? - George Carlin
I think being a woman is like being Irish. Everyone says you're important and nice, but you take second place all the same. - Iris Murdoch
I'm always worried when a woman sees me naked for the first time. That she's just gonna scream and run out of the park. - Gary Delaney
Every woman's dream is that a man will take her in his arms, throw her into bed... and clean the whole house while she sleeps. - Unknown
With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to "the best woman a man ever had." The waiter joined me. - Rodney Dangerfield
Nurse: 1. A woman whose business is to make sickness a pleasure; 2. A young women who holds your wrist and then expects your pulse to be normal.
- Daffynitions joe-ks.com