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Software Wizard

How Gandalf the Grey turned grey

Software Wizard thanks to Morris Paschold

The computerholic in The Lord of the Rings

QuotaBills
The computer is a moron. - Peter F Drucker

Defect-free software does not exist. - Wietse Venema

Computer viruses should count as life. - Stephen Hawking

We don't need nukes. We have the internet. - Alice Minium

The internet is a great way to get on the net. - Bob Dole

Immunity to boredom gives the computer an edge. - Alan Lakein

Real Soon Now: When the software will be shipped - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Mobile is a lot closer to TV than it is to desktop. - Mark Zuckerberg

Ecrastinate: Checking your e-mail just one more time - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

People will believe anything they read on the internet. - Abraham Lincoln

The e-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail. - Stephen Fry

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. - Steve Wozniak

Sleep is so cute when it tries to compete with the internet. - Will Ferrell

Iconomic: Making do with fewer icons on your computer desktop - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. - Paul Ehrlich

In software systems it is often the early bird that makes the worm. - Alan Perlis

Valentine's day without your love is like a year without the Internet. - Santosh Kalwar

People who are really serious about software should make their own hardware. - Alan Kay

Keyboard Plaque: The disgusting buildup of dirt and crud found on computer keyboards - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Internet: The best library in the world, but with all its books strewn across the floor - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Feature Creep: 1. The bloating of software with too many features; 2. A nasty software developer. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. - Douglas Coupland

Every two months, I would get an email, 'Skeleton Twins update: still don't have the money!' - Bill Hader

The Internet is so big, so powerful and pointless that for some people it is a complete substitute for life. - Andrew Brown

The Internet has turned what used to be a controlled, one-way message into a real-time dialogue with millions. - Danielle Sacks

Just as we could have rode into the sunset, along came the Internet, and it tripled the significance of the PC. - Andy Grove

Man is the cheapest 150-pound nonlinear, all-purpose computer system which can be mass-produced by unskilled labor. - NASA

Word-of-mouth marketing has always been important. Today, it's more important than ever because of the Internet. - Newt Barrett

I don't like creating software anymore. It's too exact. It's like karate; there's no room for error. - John Maeda

The new information technology (Internet and e-mail) have practically eliminated the physical costs of communications. - Peter F Drucker

If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 2,000 MPG. - Bill Gates

From sixdegrees to Friendster to Facebook, social networking has become a familiar and ubiquitous part of the Internet. - David Kirkpatrick

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are. - Will Ferrell

Just think how far we've come in the 20th Century. The man who used to be a cog in the wheel is now a digit in the computer. - Robert Fuoss

Boat Anchor: 1. Thrown out when you need it, and taken in when you don't; 2. An old computer so useless that it needs to go to sea. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

For the past 10 years, corporations have been trained that they should use all the different media. But the Internet is becoming the umbrella. - Larry Weber

Cell phones, mobile e-mail, and all the other cool and slick gadgets can cause massive losses in our creative output and overall productivity. - Robin S Sharma

Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose. - Andy Rooney


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