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The Art Of Politics

Groucho Marx at his best

The Art Of Politics thanks to Groucho Marx

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Politics makes strange postmasters. - Kin Hubbard

Man is by nature a political animal. - Aristotle

Voters want a fraud they can believe in. - Will Durst

In Congress, it's all pork, all the time. - Jim Cooper

Practical politics consists in ignoring facts. - Henry Brooks Adams

A government of law is a government of lawyers. - Saying

The problem with political jokes is they get elected. - Henry Cate, VII

The art of government is the organization of idolatry. - George Bernard Shaw

The secret of politics? Make a good treaty with Russia. - Otto von Bismarck

Government cannot and must not replace private initiative. - Kim Campbell

Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote. - George Jean Nathan

We live in a world in which politics has replaced philosophy. - Martin L. Gross

There is no distinctly American criminal class - except Congress. - Mark Twain

I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat. - Will Rogers

An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought. - Simon Cameron

Ultimatum: In diplomacy, a last demand before resorting to concessions - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Politics is a profession where the paths of glory lead but to the gravy. - Billy Boy Franklin

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for. - Will Rogers

I do have a political agenda. It's to have as few regulations as possible. - Dan Quayle

Personally, I'm against political jokes. Too often they get elected to office. - Henny Youngman

A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul. - George Bernard Shaw

Political success is the ability, when the inevitable occurs, to get credit for it. - Laurence J Peter

In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. - Margaret Thatcher

Patriotism is supporting your country all the time and your government when it deserves it. - Mark Twain

He knows nothing; and he thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career. - George Bernard Shaw

Ex-Presidents of the United States get state subsidies. Not so in Russia. You get no government support. - Mikhail Gorbachev

If a politician found he had cannibals among his constituents, he would promise them missionaries for dinner. - H L Mencken

They say women talk too much. If you have worked in Congress you know that the filibuster was invented by men. - Clare Boothe Luce

I won't eat anything that has intelligent life, but I would gladly eat a network executive or a politician. - Marty Feldman

At present, our country needs women's idealism and determination, perhaps more in politics than anywhere else. - Shirley Chisholm

Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry. - Joseph Heller

He is one of those wise philanthropists who, in a time of famine, would vote for nothing but a supply of toothpicks. - Douglas Jerrold

The business of government is to keep the government out of business - that is, unless business needs government aid. - Will Rogers

I have wondered at times what the Ten Commandments would have looked like if Moses had run them through the US Congress. - Ronald Reagan

One lesson you better learn if you want to be in politics is that you never go out on a golf course and beat the President. - Lyndon B. Johnson

The punishment which the wise suffer who refuse to take part in the government, is to live under the government of worse men. - Plato

It was revealed in a government survey published today that the Prime Minister is doing the work of two men, Laurel and Hardy. - Ronnie Corbett

A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won't cross the street to vote in a national election. - Bill Vaughan

A party of order or stability, and a party of progress or reform, are both necessary elements of a healthy state of political life. - John Stuart Mill

NEED now means wanting someone else's money. GREED means wanting to keep your own. COMPASSION is when a politician arranges the transfer. - Joseph Sobran


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